It is just stupid of me to think that after two years, there should be more to our relationship. I want a next step. You don't know what that means. You want me to come home. I can't move backwards. I can't. I worked too hard for this.
You can't leave.
You make me feel like everything I am doing is pointless in comparison to you. I work part-time, go to school part-time, have a second occasional job, I am planning a study abroad trip, oh and I'm trying to keep out relationship together.
Everyday I ask myself if we are going to be able to figure this out. I know I cannot function without you in my life. But maybe the statements right. Maybe I love you, but I'm not in love with you.
I was so excited to come home. To tell you that I am head over heels for you. That I am willing to make this work, no matter what. That I cannot image not waking up next to you.
Right now I don't even want to talk to you.
I spent the last week going on about how excited I am to see you. To everyone. Three people asked me last week if I thought we would get married. Now I don't know anything. Because you don't want to talk to me. In fact you said, if you want to talk about this again bring it up, I won't.
Great to see you're head over heels in love with me too.
Nothing hurts more than an I still love you.
