you're keeping me down.
That's a good song. What a difference 48 hours makes. Two sets. Very different.
Cristina is coming to town. I can't wait. And then in October we get to hang out with JJ. It's going to be awesome.
I really need space. I'm feeling stuck. I need something new. I'm not pushing myself as much anymore. I sort of noticed that when we were performing today. It was just sort of like where am I going?
I think I will take theory. Brush up on scales and harmonics. Could be good.
I really want to spew all over the place right now, but I feel very restricted at the current moment. Like I said, trapped in this stupid box. *kicks box*
I think I'm going to go to New Black Saturday night. It will be fun. I just feel so... right. Being there. It's where I should be. Even if I'm not necessarily behind the sound board. I hear we got a new sound board. That's kind of exciting.
I'm frustrated on all sorts of levels.
I'm going to bring a memory journal tomorrow. Stealing ideas. Again. I know.
You know, there are some people that get on your nerves a lot and that you can't handle for very long periods, but they always seem to be there when you need somebody.
Folk Fest schedule soon.
I'm stressing. It's not good. But soon I can yell at truck drivers and throw pylons and talk to my manager about life. I love her. And bring donuts and coffee in the morning and accept donuts and coffee.
I haven't decided if I'm going to go to BRoken City or not. I really want to, but I don't have the time. Like I said. I used to make space for everything and now I just cut. It's stupid. I want to do everything again. I want to push myself like I used to. I used to work and be in two shows at the same time and go to school and volunteer. What happened to that girl? I miss her. And she had better marks.
I'm confused, frustrated and lost but really excited for next year. Course selections and orientation registrations and what to pack lists have got me really excited.
Keeping me down,
Jessica
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