So last night was the first night I haven't hopped around like a beached whale all night. YAY! However that of course meant dreams...
I kept running into him everywhere, and I was like hahaha just rub it off he has a girlfriend. So I was being friends with the whole Kat group again gag. and then Aidan was back to 'normal' so we were friends with him. It was weird. Then it was like the building of our school but the school's side door led to the ocean. So Lyndsay and Anna and I and 'him' ran out onto the beach in the sand. Lynds and Anna sat on the sand but I thought its a nice day lets go sit in the ocean. So I did and I magically had short shorts on. Then for some reason he decided he was going to come into the ocean to. Then everything kind of got really blurry. But I could see brown eyes. I told him I couldn't. Ran back up shore, but the two girlies had gone back into the school. When I got into the school, my clothes were dry and Lyndsay was sitting with everyone in front of the office. For some reason Lyndsay's Dad was there even though I've never met him. And she looked at her Dad and looked at me and said that this was bad news. And she had gone through his bag. And that there were things in it I should know about. Then like those people who serve coffee in the mornings were there but there was a girl now and at another table she was serving chili. And we went to this girl every week to eat chili with her. This week she snapped at us. Apparently we scared the other kids away. Then there was something about the twins and the gym and an aux gym but that part is all so hazy.
Then I had to see him today. That wasn't going well for me. I've been working on my breathing a lot this week. Keeping stable. Keeping calm. She wrote her name on your arm today with a heart. I really have no clue what you see in her. She's just not for you. We discussed how when you enter doors you become different characters. You and me in the dressing room. I hope that wasn't a character. That's what has me in this funk. Where were you when everything was falling apart? Sitting beside me. It's weird. I don't get it. Whatever. I say that a lot.
YOU"RE HOME!!!! I got up this morning and checked FB and it said you were home and my heart lept. It really did. I booked it to the green room this morning but knew you wouldn't be there. I walked in at lunch. It was almost killing me. Knowing you were in the building. I was fumbling with the music and all my stuff when I came in. In one second you were on the chair to grabbing me. I dropped all my stuff. You swooped me up. Mystery thinks he knows, but he doesn't. Maybe he only sees what everyone else thinks they see. I didn't want to let go. I missed you so much. I told you that. Along with never leave that long again. You were gone for 12 days and I could barely handle it. I'm not sure what it means. I missed you so much and now you're home eek!!! Back to hugging and complaining and forehead kisses. Sigh. I know ok? Shut up. I know what you're thinking. I hear everything. Even when the Freudian slip came up today, I saw that look in her eyes.
Our class wants to do The Line. I want to do it. It would be good for these preppy bitches. We might have to perform tomorrow. The number isn't finished. Fuck life.
This morning all I could think about was that dream. You're home! Knowing your home makes me happy. Even if you're not beside me. We tell each other everything. Shit I haven't told you this. For good reason.
Ran 1.60 today. felt good. Breathing difficulties worry me. That's ok.
This is amazing...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgnFKNvmV7o
Love,
The Friend.
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