Quitting...

"I'm straight, but I roll that way"
Aeron I love you to pieces, you are one of the most amazing people I have ever had the chance to get close to. Your like a sister. Your one of the main reasons quitting might be difficult. Elaine you too! I love you! (You'll probably find this one day, you and your intertube skillz)
Like it is just such a waste of time, I'm not being recognized, I'm not close with a lot of people, and feel awkward a lot, I have to see you (BLAG!), the people aren't as amazing as they used to be, I miss last year.
Ruel says everyone hates their second year. It's not that I hate it, I just don't get the same feeling everytime I walk down those stairs anymore. There's a lot of other stuff I could be doing with my time.
One of the new girls I have befriended this year, heard one of me and Aerons conversations and she was like are we talking about how much you look like sex? And I was like uh.. And she was like you do. And so clearly I had to say thank you.
Then I was talking about all this with my mom, except the part where I look like sex, and she said that if I feel its not working for me I can drop out, and that if I want to join something else, they would love to have me. Now not to sound egotistical, but I can sing, I can dance, and some of the time I can act. I'm really working on that last one. I have so much energy and creativity and I just want to get out there and last year I thought Summerstock would help that but I really think it just helped me come to terms with myself and then maybe now it's showing me that it is time to move on.
I could start auditioning for community theater, I could volunteer, I could get a job, I could have enough time to get my CALM work done! I would have enough time to review my Chem homework and get it all done.
So I really don't know what I'm doing now. If I am quitting or not. Maybe I'll see what happens tomorrow, but I think it's time I move on and find somewhere else to explore my creativity. Plus I really want to find if I can take a class somewhere on using a sound board. I'm getting really into that whole music biz thing. Sigh. Why must life be so difficult. Last year Evan asked me what was holding me back and I said nothing, so I phoned, and went to Summerstock that Thursday. So what's holding me back this time?
Love,
Uncertainty

ps. You're a dick. You're doing the exact same thing to them as you did to me. Boy would I love to kick you where it counts. You selfish dick.