Naveed

And show me your my friend?
Communications.
Good stuff.
I think it's right.
I mean everything seems to be going so smoothly.
That I'm honestly trying to forget about all the crazy stuff.
I'm trying to get away from it.
Wish I would have graduated.
I'm going to be late going to bed now.
Shit.
No.
Are you kidding me?
No. Sorry.
Raine Maida is love.
I'm sorry I ever spoke.
I'm sorry I ever touched another person. Ever.
No I'm not.
Fuck you.
And your opinions.
I'm a fucking vegetarian and I'm not scared of you.
Oh so you can listen to all that crap all day. Yep.
Also who do you think is reading?
No one.
Skimmed.
Like skim milk.
Makes me puke in my mouth.
Shit my phone.
After this shit I'm hiding in bed for a few days.
My face is melting an ice pack.
I like the quiet.
I like myself.
I like other people.
Man in black says we get holiday pay tomorrow? I hope so.
Tony says we're both gonna make over 1500.
Hope your there tomorrow to talk. It seems awkward but it's totally not.
Crazy stories? I'll think of one. But in truth I'm not that wild. I'm crazy but by the books.
Why has this taken up two posts.
love,
The Only Man Who Makes My life Make Sense

*insert sad music here*

I love you hawt boy my 50 year old supervisor also thinks your hawt.
You were super nice today. I liked talking to you. I totally could have worked till 11 with you tonight. I hope you go sleep in the barrel truck. But you'll end up going out cause your trouble like that. :P Happy Birthday.
Big Four people scare the shit out of me. Spending minimal time in there.
Early this morning.
Ugh John's gate. Hold on.
Good luck in Texas with Girlfriend.
Bring sweater tomorrow. Mornings are chilly.
Face melted.
Oops.
Girlfriend and I apparently have lots in common.
Still trying to figure out how old Tony is. We're trying to find out how to entertain ourselves now that we've lost interested in the pylons.
Rick laid done the law today. Apparently he's impressed with us though cause last year was a total mess at our lot.
Don't touch me. What if I was there? What if I was scared?
People don't get me and that's cool. But don't talk shit about me and I won't about you. Like honestly doing that is total bullshit. You don't even know half of the shit. It wasn't about that. It was about what it reminded me of. And how much I hate it now. I hate it sooo much.
Rip me to pieces, spit in my eye. Well fuck you. Fuck you everyone. I hate most of you. Except some people I know I can actually truly trust. Those people are far and few between.
Love that you know about Folk. And is GC seriously the first thing that comes to your mind.
Life goes so slowly after 2:00.
I think I'll take a break tomorrow and just go hang out on the grass.
Dip and Dots. Mmm...
Love,
McSmiley
Ps. I love that you now have everyone in the car wave to me. :P Good times and good people.
Money and a tv.

I Burned The Tops Of My Hands

Uhm here are my papers.
Dude there's a Ferris wheel in your truck, go through.
I'm so tired right now.
My eyeballs hurt.
The tops of my hands hurt.
My lips hurt too.
Janet
Chloe
Danny
Tom
Rick
Tony
Gabriel
Bill
Carla
Tammy
Lauren
Chase
Luke
Deborah

And that's not even the half of it.
I love that everyone actually uses the name tags. Make you feel special.
Anyways I've said to much. I gotta go drive my snow cone machine around the block a few more times, then measure a tipi (I spelled that wrong), then say are you fucking kidding me, then say a random has cute braces, then not die talking to a truck full of boys, then not get freaked out by creepers checking me out, have Tony do all the scary work and counting, then I need to run out onto 25th avenue, not take a break, then go buy myself a trailer with eight doors and become a carnie. Uhm I live there, that's my back door.
Love,
Thanks for diving right in there today.
Oh and steal candy from Rick's nice Acadia. It's shiny.

Summer Girls

Summer is fun and crazy. I love it. This summer is going to be super crazy. It concerns me.
I wish I could just lay everything on the line here. Holding yourself back all the time is really not amazeballs.
Oh god did you just say that?!?!?!?!
Cringes.
That just did not happen.
I will not let anything happen.
GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS!!!!
AH MY BRAIN!
I need a drink.
No drinking bad.
Where is the rapist when you need her!
You are not getting in the way. In fact please get in the way. Please. Save us all the trouble.
I've got my mind set on talented kids anywho.
Ew wtf?!?! Thank you for that bud.
Ego stroking. Everyone needs some. I'm just passing around the love.
Ch.... Check. Bounce. Let me see you move... I love this song. Pat makes me wanna dance. I'd dance with him. I like his long black straight hair...
mmmmm am I gonna be trouble or what?!
Elaine, you are way tooo hot for that shit.
Cute Jessica strikes again! The Boob Monster is lost in outer space with Link. Damn you Boob Monster. I like that mine you can tell is about me since my name is in it. Lame...
Ugh I want to talk to Jay but he's being all super sly super depressive. I love you Jay.
What we need are Kensington kids.
Agreed.
I hate passive shit. actually. Passive is over rated.
Much like breathing.
Ah it was during that time bad shit happens. Trust me I've been there. 16 is a bad age. True facts.
Love,
I'll Never See You Again

Stereos - Summer Girl

Well That Was Interesting

I just opened a window wondering what to type and my fingers started. and it was weird. How badly I wanted to listen to that song. That was so weird.
Jenna makes me laugh SOOOO hard!!!!! HIS WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?! HIS WHAT??!?!?!?!?!?! That's incestuous. Uhm how? Because it's one big family. Ah.... Got it.
I love older kids. Too much fun.
You didn't text me. You are a ho.
Except your not a ho.
It wasn't the same.
Just saying.
Love,
I've Had Better

Fortunately or Unfortunately?

What to say, what to say...
Tried to steam off my skin. Didn't work. I'm not a fan of vomiting, although my stomach seems to be considering it. Haven't felt that all in a long time. Brought back that need for my old little, strong friend. That's bad.
Trying to behave but I cause more trouble. And you and your stupid looks and hand gestures make it worse. Like not even out the door. Not that it matters. Because it doesn't. I didn't even realize it was mattering. I feel like crap. I'm sorry. It's like he's gay. Seriously. That's how my brain sections these things off. I mean it was nothing. Rawr. I've done worse with people with girlfriends. Hahaha. That sounds really bad.
You're trouble! What am I going to do with you ugh...
Glad you were awake, makes me laugh.
But anyways, just to say it again it meant nothing. Which it truely did.
I mean his feet were touching you! Why aren't you in trouble?!?!
Ugh need to talk to that person. But not that person, but this other person that's like... Whatever.
Oh god, not you too... shit.
I'm going to write the book how to lose friends and alienate people. I seem to be good at it.
Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentlemen...
Oh the nuns. What a riot they are...
Whatever. Fucking. Ever.
I love that they fix up your mic. It's great. You're such a poser.
Wait I've changed topics too many times here.
Transformers good.
Megan Fox hot.
Your just a line in a sooooonnnngggg....
I wish you sang this shitty on all albums. YAY LIVE ALBUMS!
Downstairs boy was super cute. SUPER CUTE! and so was tall guy in Megatunes. I think I've seen him around before. It'll come to me later. I see him with a bass. Idk.
Hibernation sounds good.
Apparently I inspire cleaning sprees. I'll keep that in mind.
= sex. HAHAHA!
Like I said nuns.
A girl like me...
Interesting. I'll keep that in mind.
I hate you. I am trying to figure out how to get you to stay. But no. UGH! I mean TWLOHA and ROB!!!!! How the fuck are you passing this up?!?!?!?! I hate you. Nuff said.
Sensitivity. Not one of my best subjects.
Said I loved you, but I lied.

Need to vacuum.

This boy wants to play
There's no time left today
It's a shame coz he has to go home
This boy's got to work, got to sweat
Just to pay what he gets to get left all alone

Let's step outside
Let's go for a ride just for a while
No we won't get caught
Well that's what I thought until we cried

I'm still here
But it hasn't been easy
I'm sure
That you had your reasons
I'm scared
Of all this emotion
For years I've been holding it down
For years I've been holding it down

This girl tries her best every day
But it's all gone to waste
Coz there's no one around
This girl she can draw she can paint
Likes to dance she can skate
Now she don't make a sound

We'll play in the park until it's too dark for us to see
Well we'll make our way home
With mud on our clothes
She won't be pleased

For years I've been holding it down
And I'd love to forgive and forget
So I'll try to put all this behind us
Just know that my arms are wide open
The older I get the more than I know
Well it's time to let this go

I got to let it go
I got to let it go
I got to let it go
I got to let it go

By the way. That song is amazing. But just like everything else means something different than what you are thinking.

Love,
My Favourite Highway

Also I'm Marrying A Kid Named Jimmy

It's official. Just don't bring it up around him. Hahaha. Remember our Bright Eyes days? and Paul is the coolest days?
Oh how simple life was...

http://www.myspace.com/smalltalk

What he's our age. Anything could happen.

Love,
New Found Hope

Love,
You Should Be Happy

What Was I Saying About Talent?

I don't know. Not like it really matters.
Also Jay being all "I Hate Everyone" "I Suck At Life" makes me sad and he's not on. Blarg. He hasn't been on since those dicks were so extremely fucking rude to him.
I like to think of myself as a Mary Shelley. I created my own monster.
Which one? The dirty stalker one? Oh.... HAHAHAHAHA ELAINE!!!!!
OMFG JESSICA WE SHARED A BLANKET!!!! OMG YOU SHARED A BLANKET WITH HIM!?!?!?! That is the extent of my mental capacity at one in the morning phone calls.
I checked into rehab. In rehab you truely realize those that stick by you and those that you need to cut the cord to.
Why does everyone else's music suck? Because they didn't go to rehab. They said no, no, no.
How did it end up like this? The power of brain washing machines!!!! I'm sad that, that must happen to you. And I'm sorry that I cannot save you from it. Liars actually extremely impress me. Derked taught me a lot about liars too. And how liars create actors. Because you tell one lie. And you see how well you can get away with it. Then you realize your acting. And you realize how fucking good you actually are at it. Not that Derek would ever have sworn.
Jessica, I can't sleep with him... WHAT?!?? OH YEAH he isn't the age of consent. HAHAHHA THAT"S BAD!
Why did I talk to him today? Bad idea. Listening to your stories last night, reminded me of my own. Hates life. I need Jay's happy shirts.
OMG CLEANED ROOM! ROOM SMELLS FANTASTIC!!!!
I have the swine. Except not. Except most likely.
I have to stop listening to this song.
YAWN!
You never texted me back you imbusil. I mean I love you. Oh shit I need to bake things. Rawr. Fuck life.
I want to talk to Jared cause he makes me happy, but shall refrain. Mainly because I respect people. But you know.
Why is it freezing in this room. My tummy feels funny. Oh no the swine is kicking in again....
Why do those girls hold their camera's infront of their faces! That's so stupid! They should be enjoying the moment.
And that's when Adam Lazzara talked to me but I didn't notice. Fu....... HAHAHAHA!
I think my belt is too tight...
Now that is better.
It's only the internet.
Thank you Petey for my now mantra.
Writing at 604 records today. Damn my life, why don't I have my job there yet...
So does that mean you're no longer leaving? It'd be cheaper on the pocket book. But not cheaper on the heart.
YAY THERAPY! Hahaha. I think I would be a therapists worst nightmare. They'd have no clue what I was talking about at all.
OH NO NOT WATER AND CUCUMBERS!!!!
OH GAWD THE BUN!
HOLY SHIT!
Ok people let us have an online ettiquette lesson. When bread is delivered to the table. ou break off a piece and put it on your plate. You put on a little bit of butter. Then rip off an even smaller piece and take small bites at it.
CAN YOU GO CHECK ON MY POTATOS?!?!?! I DON"T WANT THEM TO DIE!!!! GET OFF THE COMPUTER I NEED TO HARVEST MY POTATOS!!!!!
I want rockstar lessons... Boo....
Don't touch me when I'm sleeping babe, or I'll break your neck... I realized I was a victim of date rape.
One of the best songs ever. Jenna disagrees. But that's chill.
So you get the drummer on weekends and I get him on the weekdays. Oh and I guess you could have the rest of them....
STEVE OMG I LOVE YOUR BAND!!! Next time you talk to Steve tell him I want to have his babies... I'll get right on that...
oooo My apples are almost ready...
And then they figured they needed another band member, so they looked for one at the zoo.
So how's your ego today? Oh it's working at about 500%!!!!!! Can't you tell!!!!!! Yes, yes I can. And how are you actually on a 1 - 10 tdoday? Oh at about a 3. Thank you the rapist for figuring out all my problems. I loved that class.
Why am I listening to the Jonas Brothers?
How do you solve a problem like maria? Insert hours of laughter. Love Kevin.
I wish I had Rainbow Veins....
I love that NPH always comes into convo.
I keep trying to sing your song but end up singing weightless.
Has any of this made sense?
I thought not.
I just wanted to randomly type somewhere.
Don't want to work on story.
Because he has to leave.
I'm done with the whole leaving thing.
I wish I could leave.
Wait, I think I did. Whoops.
OMG I FOUND THE NEW FRESHMAN HE"S HITTING ON!!!! HE HAS HER BRAINWASHED!!! Just wait till I show up.
So my main gay loves my boobs. Gay kids hate my boobs. Remember Shea? Your boobs are on my chest.
Logs on.
I love ya sexy momma
Except not as hot as Megan Fox
Yeah, but your boobs are better.
Take that gay kids do like my boobs!
HAHAHAHAHA!!!
No one would ever understand us. Teen angst is making us millions.
Hey babe.
Stupid Cute Jessica. She does this to me all the time. Dresses me up. Acts nice. Ugh! I think I might tie her up and throw her down the river like I did with old Jessica.
Old Jessica was so boring and depressing. I hated her. Almost as much as I hated last Jessica and the Jessica I'm living in now.
Want to write a script. That could be in there. It's gonna be crazy therapy shit. It'll be great. I'll become a fucking millionaire.
If not just go to Draft Camp. No biggie.
I'll take a chance on leaving
It's that or stay and die
I loved you once and though
You love me still I know
It's time for me to fly
I loved you once and though
I love you still I know
It's time for me to go
And so, goodbye

Raincheck. Need sleep today. Badly. Apparently so did you.
Why am I still rambling. This shit doesn't deserve to be posted. Remeber when I said half-assed. That's what this is.
Love,
I wished that tomorrow no one dies.

I Used To Be Love Drunk and Now I'm Really Single

Ok I get that.
Moral of story. Don't date models.
Or anyone for that matter of fact.
Ok so at first listen, first 30 seconds I wasn't too into it. It's better than anything I think on the last album because this has more of a happy dance beat to it. Unlike the old album which I really thought was missing on the old one, knowing Martin. But as soon as it gets into the chorus it's pretty good. I mean the lyrics aren't profound. The verses could be stronger but all together the chorus is really strong. This drum beat is from another song though. Fuck now that's going to bother me. Yeah I really don't like the first verse. But after the first chorus it's good. Maybe because I get it. I understand the walking around, slipping in and out of conciousness, the alcohol. I get it.
HOLY SHIT I HATE THE KEY CHANGE! NO KEY CHANGES MARTIN! THIS IS NOT A FUCKING MUSICAL!
Ok I just really needed to get that out of system.
But I can see this being good live with the crowd. I get that one too.
I think I know all the lyrics on the third listen. I mean it doesn't have that danger labels are really looking for. But it's dancing. I seem to think there is 5 am inspiration in here somewhere.
Also totally forgot about it. Thank you for the email Paul. Hahaha.
Oh god I get it. I needed this like 10 months ago. Thanks guys.
Also Martin I think you should get over how cool it is to sing harmonies with yourself. I used to think it was cool, now it pisses me off especially since you have other dudes in your band that love singing. I also wish you involved the guys more in the writing process. I mean Paul was barely there and the music knowledge he has of composing music is more than people would expect. He was going to go to school in LA to study composing until Martin corrupted him. But live I know the guys will be backing you up more because you can't sing all that without awkward breaks for breathing. As overrated as breathing is, it is necessary.
Not posting this till I finish MJ post. Sorry this MJ post isn't as important.
Also if that's the single, I'm concerned about the rest of the album... But I still love you and appreciate your music.
Love,
All The Single Ladies

Ps. the drum beat sounds better if you swing your head fast and get that noise when you like cover and uncover your ears quickly. Do it. Makes the song better. I swear.
3:15 what is with the random scream? HAHAHAHA! What is this nonsense...

She Writes Her Life Story, But She Can't Turn The Page

I'm at a loss for words.
Slightly for the fear of words.
Perez Hilton my man, you gotta think things through a bit more. You got carried away this week man. I think you need to lock yourself in doors for a week and just take some time.
TMZ gained a lot of credibility today. But honestly photos of him? Like hospital staff had to have taken them out of a window.
Larry King tonight.
Transformers ended. We wanted to stick till the end. Mom starts talking with Manager. Manager tells us. We run out of the theater calling everyone, on twitter and facebook instantly.
Will continue this later.
Farah. Must go.
We're listening to CNN on the radio. It's absolutely crazy. I'm in like a state of shock. It all just seems soooo surreal.
Got home on Twitter reading everything instantly. Rumors of the other two deaths were ridiculous. Like come on people.
Watched 20/20 and NBC special. Taped Larry King and Anderson Cooper. Situation Room is recording right now. The coroner is supposed to release what he found soon.
I'm just truely at a loss for words.
This man was great. And the shit people said about him throughout the years is truely stupid. and watching some of these specials just pissed me off. At a time of mourning you do not discredit a person, you admire the full and influential life they lived.
We will miss you a lot Michael Jackson.
We are all in mourning over your death and are celebrating the amazing life you had.
You are a true inspiration.
You told me about equality.
You also taught me not to go around breaking little girls hearts.
And it is because of you MJ that I will not turn the music down. The rest of them can eat this!
Love,
You Forever Michael Jackson

amazed!

Ok so upon writing I wrote "Five years and two cd's ago."
Hold on a sec... Holy shit it has been five years. And kinda two cd's ago. Depends how you look at it...
Wanted to talk with Brother, she's here.
What the hell are you doing? I'm an actress. Geebus.
Thought you were cute. Turned out your an ass.
Really excited for life.
Kinda tired. But I think its cause I'm feeling nice and toasty about now.
Listening to Folk Fest play list.
So I think us talking three times in one week is unhealthy. You know who you are Steve... OMG STEVE I LOVE YOUR BAND!!!! Wait which one is Steve... You know STEVE the LEAD SINGER! He's mine! You can have the rest... Ok.... Tell Steve next time you talk I want his babies. Hahahahaha....
I love talking with my other peoples. They haven't been on past two days. Makes me sad.
My stomach is burning alive. Holy moly. I thought this was just from the old belt. Apparently not. Leaking interested fluids, am I.
Bought new jeans.
OMG THE CUTEST BOY IN GR 10 IS TALKING TO ME! BE A COUGAR ELAINE! I WILL CHANNEL YOU MY INNER COUGAR!
Also apparently I'm a cougar. Well who's arguing? Remember when I used to like 30 year olds. Yeah those were interesting times... Thanks bud...
Ammelia Curran
However I had a fucking revelation today. Why I'm not head over heels for The Latency boys. Because their recordings. Have no emotion what's so ever. I mean its not something I'd expect a someone to be able to teach them to portray. No offense to that special someone. But these guys could be great. Maybe the LP will actually get me. Because the lyrics and songs are good, there's just no substance to them. I'm going to host acting classes for musicians and make fucking millions.
Elaine has a date with a boy in Gr. 10. I should have gone out with her tonight. Gay.
So itchy. Cold koolaid on itch as we speak. Is happy making.
Those were some interesting looks today. I'll talk to you about it later.
I feel like I keep half assing shit on here. It's pissing me off.
Also I am never going to take anti-depressants in my life. Guess I share the same stance as Tom cruise.
Maybe that's what this is. When I'm old and crazy my doctors can read this and be like holy shit. and then they will realize I'm doomed for life.
Like I said I'm half assing shit recently.
I should have gone out with Elaine. Nathan was there too. I love him. He's fun. They went to Loose Moose. Maybe this new boy will come to movie nights. Speaking of which I should read up on.
Fuck this being half- assed.
I'm leaving.

Love,
Done, but tomorrow I do it again.

This Needs To Be Documented

Tuesday:
Chem test
Orientation

Wednesday:
I NEED PANTS!
AND A WHOLE BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF!

Thursday:
TRANSFORMERS!!!!!!!! AHHH!!!!

Friday:
Going out with Colin to movie... Maybe... We'll see...

Saturday:
Sarah's House!

Sunday:
Sarah's House!

Monday:
Work 10 hours

Tuesday:
Work 10 hours

Wednesday:
Work 10 hours

Thursday:
Work 10 hours
Seventh Rain
Marianas Trench
Hanging out after

Friday:
Work 10 hours
Hinder

Saturday:
Work 10 hours
Saving Abel

Sunday:
Work 10 hours
Chucks maybe?

Monday:
Work 10 hours
The New Cities
Simple Plan

Tuesday:
Work 10 hours
Inward Eye
The Trews

Wednesday:
Work 10 hours
The Ending
Thornley

Thursday:
Work 10 hours
Chucks maybe?

Friday:
Work 10 hours
Karl Wolf

Saturday:
Work 10 hours
Daniel Wesley
Bif Naked

Sunday:
Work 10 hours

Then I am done! Thank geebus! I can't wait. I love being on the go. Also apparently they don't have to pay us time and a half for Canada Day because we haven't been working there for 30 days.
I fail to see the complaints. I'm excited!
Well when they interview you it's more than your answers.
You can work on your schmoozing!
YAY!
holy shit spellcheck recognizes schmoozing but not spellcheck. HAHAHHAA!

Love,
Revenge Never Looked So Good Before

Read The Whole Thing Minute By Minute On Twitter

So last night since my ailments keep me up I'm checking twitter and Perez posted that he was bleeding and shit. So I read back down and about 20 minutes before he's tweeted that Will.I.Am beat him up. (Well this will give Canada publicity) Guys this was crazy. I was up probably till 4am watching movies and barely found out what happened. Actually I was so worried when my alarm went off I jumped out of bed to see if there were photos and what not yet. There's video on TMZ of the fight but you can barely see a thing! You hear Perez call him a faggot (which he admits to) and then you can't really see anything cause the people start running away and then you hear this instant cry. Like sobbing. And Perez was with Gaga like always (Thank you to God and they gays), and her one body gaurd. Anyways I'm going to link you up with Perez's full video. Because it made me want to punch Will.I.Am. Perez was extremely smart last night and did exactly what he should have done. He documented it on twitter. Called the cops. Had everbody calling the cops. But they didn't show up for about an hour. This morning he made a video. This is crazy guys.
http://perezhilton.com/2009-06-22-my-statement
I love you Perez.
And you called your Lawyers too. Good move man. Good move.
I love you Perez and you will not be the one to blame for this.

Love,
To You Perez
Don't let this stop you, keep doing what you are doing!

1:08brokenelegance:plus fat is totally a feeling especially on days where you want to just shove chocolate in your face and hide fromt he world.

1:09jaybrannan:(every day)

There's 3 of us on chat. Me, Jay and Oodles. I love these people. It's weird I know.

Crap I left and she talked. Now that I want to talk to her she left. Oh my friend on the island. Yay fat is a feeling and shape!!!! Jay's off to. Hope I didn't spoil his day, not that he usually has bright days. Sorry Jay. Love ya!

Well There's A Slap Across The Face

She's dating Morgan. Again. Hahaha.
Sorry. I shouldn't laugh. Oh I have every right to!!!!
I guess in some ways I miss you but this is better. It is so much better this way. You kept me quiet. But not like that. I don't know. You need a housewife. That's not me. I think I was something different and that entertained you for a moment.
Why was I a bitch? Because you weren't very cooperative. Maybe that's why.
It wouldn't have worked anywho.
I love talking about those days. They were something alright.
Going back will be interesting to say the least...
Thinking about all that stuff makes it seem sooo far away.
I like this song.

Love,
you Jenna

I Have A Disorder

It's unfortunate. Apparently, according to valuable resources, it will transform me into Party Marty where I will wake up without pants on and not remember the night before. Thanks bud. Apparently it has something to do with what they call a night owl. Apparently going to bed at 5:50 am classifies you as one of these. The night before that 3 am. Thanks to a spider and Jay and oodles. But last night. The world was quiet. It wasn't dark and scary. It was quiet and lonely. I started watching Moulin Rouge. Almost got to the end but I got bored. Then started watching some Veronica Mars. Then I decided to look away from the screen and noticed my room to be unusually bright. I open the curtains and holy shit the sun is rising. Now it is very difficult to get to sleep when your room is as bright as day. That's all I'm saying.
And sleeping without pants is comfortable. I suggest it sometime people. I'm not saying naked. I'm just saying without pants. Booty shorts do not count as pants.
You seem to good. To good to be true.
MMVA's successful? Mtrench didn't win as much as they deserved but that's cool. Nickelback is lame and overplayed and over marketed. I'm pretty sure that was Matt's nipple. So weird seeing him like that and how he was after the show. Also rad dance moves Josh. My brother didn't believe there was a dance. He now knows the dance. Doing the dance in a mosh pit is difficult though...
I love Kevin Rudolph. I think his music is new and I like it. It's rock but its dance and has feeling to it at the same time. I think he's a force to be reckoned with.
Also Josh, Glambert did steal your hair. You've got that one.
A first kiss does not include silly elementary kisses. A kiss is a KISS, man.
Mmm Spring Fresh!
Ok girls like that really piss me off. and just to put this out there. I only told one guy, once ever, that is in a band, that I thought he was hot. And that was Paul. So I can be exempt from that because he is gorgeous. Hell I'd still tell him that. But these girls who are going gaga over Ryan is disgusting. Like are you really comfortable with him knowing your obsessed with him and the other guys in the band being weirded out by you? I really think that last October took me over the line. I've kinda hated it since. I mean, it's like I say, It's about the music. If people ever really look into music and see how much there is to it they might grow up a little bit. Seeing bands on shows like that makes me sad. Because I know how much they fight it, but how much PR pushes it. Anything to be remembered. It's a tough business. Like sure its fun, but at night in your room is it still as much fun? I think we've all read about someone who experiences that. They didn't show you and the boys tonight. Made me sad. I hate talking to musicians when they are in the character vibe. I'd rather just talk to them. That's something that will make you feel special, to actually TALK to them. I guess that is my spiel for the day.

Love,
It's About The Secret

Ps. I'm cleaning up your mess. Why would you say that to somebody is such a volitile emotional state. I hate people who don't think.

He asked you to kiss him. Twice.

STFU!
Oh Brother I love our conversations and our inspirations... We are gonna be so much trouble one day. Were you checking out the waiter?!?! No you were! He's to emo for me. He's not emo enough for me. Are you two talking about the waiter? No!
Watching old episodes. I see the joke now. I get it all. It was a smart career move.
He removed the lip ring.
Bad move.
All I remember is a tan guy with big arms.
HAHAHA!
Still awake.
Why am I a night person.
And I'll buy you a drink.
Stuck in my head all day.
Stereos. Figured it out in the shower.
Jay's not on. Neither are fun people like last night. Weather and tacos. Mac books. The works. Great convos. Love how Gamb remembered me. Tough night for Jay last night. Tough night for me.
Love,
Buy my new shirt, I suck at life.

Just When You Had Me Believing I Could Feel Again

I could give a million reasons why we should not be friends...
Your a tease, your a cock-blocker, your a loud mouthed bitch and a big talker, but that's ok.

I love being your friend. As much as it may sometimes confuse me. I was in a shitty mood and you made me really happy. You know just what buttons to push. You know when a giggle is about to happen. I love you, but I don't love you.

I know you'll go back to him, and maybe you should.
Hope you don't go backwards, I'm going on ahead.

Now you have to buy the goddamn song on myspace.
Hi. Oh shit.

I wanted to do what I did with his lyrics with another favourite musician of mine.
This could take a while.

Is this promenade a musician?
And all that man can do is always compare original?
Doesn't matter what I say all I know is I got it in me.
And why do all the other records sound the same?
And I can stay right here.
And I ain't going off to pee.
But you won't hear one word I say.
No you're not listening.
So what I'm doing nothing here.
This time I'll play when the talented people don't show up.
If I don't got nothing good to say
So then why say it?
And I can stay right here.
And I ain't going off to pee.
But you won't hear one word I say.
Shutup and say.
"Yeah. I thought the punk scene was about unity
and creating an atmosphere of uh think for yourself.
Do what you want and not care about what other people thought about you.
It's not about creating cliques and trying to take what punk is.
Punk is what you want it to be.
It's about what anybody wants it to be.
It's about what you control it should be.
Punk's what you think it is."
I'm just standing here and people doing philosophy.
And it won't make one total difference on penny royalties.

I didn't mean to leave you hanging on
I didn't mean to leave you all alone
I didn't know what to say

The first star I see may not be a star.
We can't do a thing but wait.
So let's wait for one more.
The time such clumsy time in deciding if it's time.
I'm careful but not sure how it goes.
You can loose yourself in your courage.
The mindless comfort grows when I'm alone with my 'great' plans.
This is what she says gets her through it:
"If I don't let myself by happy now then when?"
If not now when?

With pride keep every failure in.
And with pride hold on to the sinking.
Now in the deep and down your heart moves.
Now in the deep and down, I don't know how but I know I want out.
Wait for something better.

Wait for something better?
I shouldn't, it's not enough.
Pull one excuse from another.
Just one excuse from another.
This time it means us. stop.

You say the most beautiful things,
an endless list of treasures of trimmings.
It takes all my faith just to start
I don't care now how much I'm wrong
my song it shames your ears
every sentence a failure.
Slant rhyme is all I can give half truth is all I'll get.
Show us all what grace can mean,
all of what I might be.
Close your eyes call it escape.
We'll run away from everything
Lie to me,
love me
We'll run away from everything.

I’m not crazy cause I take the right pills everyday.

Are you gonna live your life wonderin’ standing in the back lookin’ around?
Are you gonna waste your time thinkin' how you’ve grown up or how you missed out?
Things are never gonna be the way you want.
Where's it gonna get you acting serious?
Things are never gonna be quite what you want.
Or even at 25, you gotta start sometime.
I’m on my feet, I’m on the floor, I’m good to go.
Now all I need is just to hear a song I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.
I wanna fall in love tonight.
Are you gonna live your life standing in the back looking around?
Are you gonna waste your time?
Gotta make a move or you'll miss out.
Someone's gonna ask you what it’s all about.
Stick around nostalgia won't let you down.
Someone's gonna ask you what it’s all about.
Whatcha gonna have to say for yourself?
I’m on my feet, I’m on the floor, I’m good to go.
Now all I need is just to hear a song I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.
I wanna fall in love tonight.
Crimson and clover, over and over.
Crimson and clover, over and over.
Our house in the middle of the street, why did we ever meet?
Started my rock 'n roll fantasy.
Don't don't, don't let's start, why did we ever part?
Kick start my rock 'n rollen heart.
I’m on my feet, I’m on the floor, I’m good to go.
So come on Davey, sing me somethin’ that I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.
I wanna fall in love tonight.
Here tonight.

Hey, you know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own, so don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else.

If you still care at all, don't go, tell me now.
If you love me at all, please don't, tell me now.

There's no one in town I know
You gave us some place to go.
I never said thank you for that.
I thought I might get one more chance.
What would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
And if you were with me tonight,
I'd sing to you just one more time.
A song for a heart so big,
god wouldn't let it live.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

I see it around me, I see it in everything.
I could be so much more than this.
I said my goodbye's this is my sundown.
I'm gonna be so much more than this.
With one hand high, you'll show them your progress.
You'll take your time, but no one cares.
No one cares.
I need you to show me the way from crazy.
I wanna be so much more than this.
With one hand high, you'll show them your progress.
You'll take your time, but no one cares.
With one hand high, you'll show them your progress.
You'll take your time, but no one cares.
No one cares.
I could be so much more than this.
No one cares.
I wanna be so much more than this.
No one cares.
I could be so much more than this.
No one cares.
I wanna be so much more than this.
No one cares.
I wanna be so much more than this.
No one cares.
I wanna be so much more than this.
Good goodbye lovely time.
Good goodbye tin sunshine.
Good goodbye I'll be fine.
Good goodbye, good goodnight.

Can't say I was never wrong
But some blame rests on you
Work and play they're never okay
To mix the way we do

I know it but can't help feeling differently
I loved you, and I should have said it
But tell me just what has it ever meant
I can't help it baby, this is who I am (am)
Sorry, but I can't just go turn off how I feel (feel)
You kill me, you build me up, but just to watch me break (hey hey, hey hey)
I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

i'm in love with the ordinary
i need a simple space
and rest my head
everything gets clear
well i'm a little ashamed for asking
but just a little helps
it gets me straight again
helps me get over it (over it)
it might seem like a dream
but it's real to me
don't it feel like sunshine afterall
the world we love forever, gone
we're only just as happy
as everyone else seems to think we are
you should see the canals are freezing
you should see me high
you should just be here
be with me here
it doesn't seem theres hope for me
i let you down
but i won't give in now
not for any amount

I don't feel the way I've ever felt.
I know.
I'm gonna smile and not get worried.
I try but it shows.
Anyone can make what I have built.
And better now
Anyone can find the same white pills.
It takes my pain away.
[Chorus]
It's a lie. A kiss with open eyes
And she's not breathing back.
Anything but bother me.
(It takes my pain away)
Nevermind these are hurried times.
Oh oh oh
I can't let it bother me.
I never thought I'd walk away from you.
I did.
But it's a false sense of accomplishment.
Every time I quit
Anyone can see my every flaw.
It isn't hard.
Anyone can say they're above this all.
It takes my pain away.
I can't let it bother me.

Stay with me
You're the one I need
You make the hardest things
Seem easy
Keep my heart
Somewhere drugs don't go
Where the sunshine slows
Always keep me close
If only you could see
The stranger next to me
You promise you promise that you're done
But i cant tell you from the drugs
Don't let go
Well dig a great big hole
Down an endless hole
We'll both go
You're so blind!
You can't save me this time
Hope comes from inside
And I feel so low tonight
If only you could see
The stranger next to me
You promise you promise that you're done
But I can't tell you from the drugs
I wish you could see
This face in front of me
You're sorry you swear it you're done
But I can't tell you from the drugs

I'll say it straight and plain
I know I've made mistakes
I've always been afraid
I've always been afraid
A thousand nights or more
I travel east and north
Please answer the door
Can you tell me
You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me
Get down on your knees
Whisper what I need
Something pretty
Something pretty
I feel that when I'm old
I'll look at you and know
The world was beautiful
Then you tell me...
You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me
I'm done, there's nothing left to show
I try but can't let it go
Are you happy where you're standing still?
Do you really want the sugar pill?
I'll wake up tomorrow and I'll start
Tonight it feels so hard
As the train approaches Gare Du Nord
As I'm sure your kiss remains employed
Am I only dreaming?
You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

I felt for sure last night
That once we said goodbye
No one else will know these lonely dreams
No one else will know that part of me
I'm still driving away
And I'm sorry every day
I won't always love these selfish things
I won't always live...
Not stopping...
It was my turn to decide
I knew this was our time
No one else will have me like you do
No one else will have me, only you
You'll sit alone forever
If you wait for the right time
What are you hoping for?
I'm here I'm now I'm ready
Holding on tight
Don't give away the end
The one thing that stays mine
Amazing still it seems
I'll be 23
I won't always love what I'll never have
I won't always live in my regrets
You'll sit alone forever
If you wait for the right time
What are you hoping for?

Wonder why I'm so caught of guard when we kiss.
Rather live my life in regret then do this.
What happened to the love we both knew?
We both chased.

Hushed with a finger

Lie lie better next time, stay on my side tonight oh


I have a ringing in my head
And no one to help me answer it
Even with you close enough to kiss.
Every minute is arranged
Every moment lasts a day
But thinking about it can't help me let go, I know.
Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk
Gotta love how it's somehow all on me
All the petty scenes
And all the pretty things
Say whatever you want
'Cause I can laugh it off.
I can laugh it off.
I must look like I'm running away
To you at your faster pace
I wonder what it is you could have seen, in me.
I'm the evil one who said.
Gonna let everything just happen
Just like my chest, my ears are proud
The collision is such an ugly sound.
I can hear you now
Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk
Gotta love how it's somehow all on me
All the petty scenes
And all the pretty things
Say whatever you want
'Cause I can laugh it off.
Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk
Gotta love how it's somehow all on me
And all the petty scenes
And all the pretty things
Say whatever you want
'Cause I can laugh it off.
I can laugh it off.
I can hear you now
Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk
Gotta love how it's somehow all on me
All the petty scenes
And all the pretty things
Say whatever you want
'Cause I can laugh it off.
Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk
Gotta love how it's somehow all on me
All the petty scenes
And all the pretty things
Say whatever you want
'Cause I can laugh it off.

I'll force a laugh to break the silence
It's gonna get harder still
Before it gets easy
You can't keep safe what wants to break
I'm alone in this
I'm as I've always been
Right behind what's happening

How you gonna know the feeling till you've lost it
I've been losing plenty since

Does it feel good like a memory
When you try some history
It's a dream to come around
The rule doesn't bend,
Because the taste doesn't taste the same again
It's easy feeling righteous when removed
All you'll get as what you wanna hear
It hurts because it should
How else am I to make it clear?
I could never be the one that you want, don't ask.
Well, here's to living in the moment
'Cause it passed.
Maybe a lie is what I need sometimes
You told the most and best of anyone
You said to "keep me in your pocket"
So I carried you
You better choose your words carefully
Because I'm not your anything
Gonna stay here in my place
And you'll stay in yours because
You're only good as what you're good for
I pace around the room to spend the time
Waiting while the burning pictures fade
One thing to make your mind
And another to say its name
I could never be the one that you want, don't ask.
Well, here's to living in the moment
'Cause it passed, it passed.
I'm still carrying a little hope that
Maybe things could get different now
Is that so wrong, is that so wrong, is that so wrong?
Would I see you tonight
At a place we go?
Could going through the motions, lead to real emotion?
I wanna make things right
Before time runs out.
It was like you said, the taste don't taste like it should
Roll down the windows
Let the cold air come in
Slap my face just feel you somehow again, again....


There's a chance, one of us will give in soon
I could ask, but what's an answer gonna prove?
I try to get mad, but the fever drops
My heart can't break 'cause the beating stops
Yeah, suck that lucky feeling right outta me.
Wanna laugh? Take a look around the room
It's a dance, tired steps in brand new shoes
I can only take a guess what the morning brings
If it feels too good, then it probably is.
Yeah, suck that lucky feeling right outta me
I follow your sign, where it leads I go.
But you turned your back so easily,
It tells me everything I need, yeah.
Waiting for the line to move a foot, yeah
Wasting my life on nothing good
Suck that lucky feeling right outta me
I should act; tie it down or cut you loose
It's a trap, any direction I move.
When I try to sing along, the needle skips
I huff and then I puff but my house is bricks, yeah
Suck that lucky feeling right outta me
Yeah you sucked that lucky feeling right outta me.
Yeah you sucked that lucky feeling right outta me, yeah.

On, it's on.
I declare my room a scene
Gone, then gone
It's too much that they say you need
It's not perfection, yeah
How boring if it is
Nothing new for me
Light on up
With everybody watching you
Lights go down
Everything is yours to lose
First dancer takes the floor
Laugh what you can't ignore
What you gonna do
Waiting for attention
I'm not
Cut it to the left
And I rock
Need an invitation
I don't
Slide it to the right
And I roll
Here it goes
Crowning up the cool kid queen
There it goes
The competition show their teeth
I'll let them fight it out
It's just my party now
What I want to be
Stand on up
Everyone in queue in costume
Stare on out
Don't get sucked in for a second
Bright lights might say your name
They only light the stage
Nothing there to prove
Waiting for attention
I'm not
Cut it to the left
And I rock
Need an invitation
I don't
Slide it to the right
And I roll
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Don't accept critique or credit
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Definition always changes
It's not the same as yours
You could be so much more
The closer that you get

This is where our diligence has lead
The waves roll in to claim our patient steps
Can we become more than just ourselves?
And leave the sand, our want, our will, our doubt
It's firefight, I won't run.
They're spitting spite all through my blood
For you and me, there's nowhere left to hide
Except you and me, there's no one else alive
This is now the moment after next.
Are these still the eyes of a temptress?
Why open the door if you won't go?
Don't ask twice if you don't wanna know.
It's firefight, I won't run.
They're spitting spite all in my blood
For you and me, there's nowhere left to hide
Except you and me, there's no one else alive
Is there an answer?
If it's an honest one, honestly worth its question
There's no question
The city as my witness
I am who I wanna be, but you could be anything
Just be anything here with me.
Endless quotes and with the secondhand
If you let go then that's where time will stand.

i looked at you, you said to me, "jay, we're worth more" I love you Jay. You are fantastic. Don't let those fuckers tell you otherwise. I'm glad I found that. I need that place. The family we have because we all share the same feeling of hate towards Jay. :P I love you Jay.

It pisses me off when people make asses of themselves. When they say stuff they know nothing about. It ruins a lot of shit.

You say fuck a lot when your mad. Thanks Conor. Glad we figured that one out when we were 9... Hahaha...

I don't think I told you guys I saw him. I wanted cold burning air. I wanted the burning. But I didn't. I got off the bus. Actually as the bus was rolling up, I saw him. And her. But. So anyways. KFed was standing there. When I got off the bus I didn't look at him. Or back. I just walked. Away. Before. A) Puking B) Screaming C) Crying D) Punching someone's face

I need for you to leave me the fuck alone. If you only saw, what they all see. That maybe you are just a little too into me.

Thanks to those who loved me. When I could not love myself.

I have a few things to say. But I won't. I'll hold it in. Till I can see the look. The look of no surprise. The look of. You're not above that.

I'm leaving.

Best friend's here to talk.

I'm out.

Love,
I gave Frankenstein life. I created my own monster.

Luke Pickett We Should Get Married

Who said mullets weren't hot? I for shizzle didn't. Remember LV guy? He had a mullet. But not as hot as Luke.

Lyndsay says I'm dying.
Fuck.
Lyndsay says I started it.
I changed her opinion pretty quick.

Love,
Great Depression Records Marketing How May I Help You?

I'm Taking Back My Life!

weird stalker today. I finally said I'm uncomfortable when people follow me. He said yeah that must suck. And then continued following me

I love this kid. Such a talent. It's crazy. Totally mind boggling. What will I tell him? Not to sleep naked. But I think he learned that lesson himself already...

Crap Jay's playing again tonight. No sleeps for me. Even though in New York it's like 2 hours later there. He tries so hard. It's amazing. The entertainment industry doesn't hate you Jay, it's just having technical difficulties right now clearing out them suits!

I don't have street smarts, I have book smarts.
And see I have street smarts.
Oh I know bud.
We should get together and write a book!
Then we should read it!
Hahahaha....

HA! That's a good one.

I'm having pains today. I want life to go away and die. I spent most of the day lying around the house. It's unfortunate. I was going to go. And I totally should have. Whatever.

Is it really worth it for me to hold myself back just so you can feel comfortable with yourself. I'm starting to realize maybe that is not the right idea.

Randoms make me lol so hard. I love it. Why am I so out there? I'm not really sure but I love it. I love it just as much as spending time with myself in peace and quiet.

Jay keeps skipping out. Lame. Yawning. Oh no. That makes me yawn.....

Some girl just added me on twitter and she said you must pay to see my sex pics. Who are these people? HAHAHAHAHA!!!! All bands I usually just accept on twitter. Because bands do stupid stuff that make me shake my head. Like the fat burger challenge! HAHAHAHA OH GOD PETE!

You'll like this new show. He's in a band. And he looks like that Cyrus guy...
TRACE?!?!? HAHAHAHA What a champ....

I clearly aspire to be Trace Cyrus.

Nick wears plaid!
I do too! Yay I have something in common with Nick Jonas!
ME TOO!
Also that Nick Jonas is pretty cute, we should add him to the list.

Who is this Todd kid and why does he love Jacob Black?!?! Hahaha...

Omg drewbrody.com
AMAZING! HOLLA!

Jay what kind of movies are you MAKING??!?!?!

I started a convo on words and the context. hahaha... Oh boy. Fag. Ugh. hate it.

I think I'm in love with Drew Brody. I'm getting bored with Jay. Well for tonight that is. It'll be really quiet. Then he talks a lot. Or sings. He sings more than I do.

you're not fat since you started your eating disorder, I mean diet.

HAHAHAHA! I'm excited to see them boys too!

And I had a feeling I could be someone. Name the song bitchez! It's a woman?!?! Wait... I thought it was a man.

Why do I have so many windows open?

Plain Jane. Excited. Should be great. Love Chantal. She's such an inspiration.

I really think the world still bases a lot on weight. I know what I'd like to look like idealy. I know this conversation topic usually scares people off or it puts up a red flag in their minds. I mean hey I love the way I look. I love my body. But there's always part of you that wants to take care of it. To trim it up a bit. However, I support doing so in a healthy manner, even though it seems tough. Eating disorders are not cool or funny. But love your body no matter what shape it is, and if you want to' improve it' what's the big deal? If you're doing something that is going to make you a happier person, don't stop yourself. Don't let other people get in your way. I think about weight a lot when it comes to the real world. Not in a negative light though. Nor in a negative light about myself. I mean hey, I'm the one who paraded around in Becca's sisters dress! Hahaha. If you've ever seen Becca's sister, you'd understand. I hear it looked hawt. I'm glad there's no video to prove it. Haha.

Jay's speaking spanish. I think I'm signing out of chat now...

Jay said bye to me. My life is complete! I don't think I can leave now... Hahaha... It's my dream in life to see Jay play live. Oh god this is a bad conversation.... Alright I left. Now I'm happy.


Ok blabbering on is done. I have actual people to talk to now about life.

Love,
Just not beautiful to me. Just how beautiful do I have to be?

Crap I Am Going To Be A Record Snob

I am a record snob.
This song made me happy.

I really want to know what that song was tonight, but I can't find anything about it. Ugh. I'll continue the hunt.
Watched an old episode of George.
Found a blog site. There's like 100 people searching for this song. Hahaha.
Back to George.

Gene Simmons is my hero. He has done it all. ALL! It's a true inspiration. And the words he said I agreed with sooo much. People hate him but he's such an act. He's a total character. If you've ever seen him in a 'real' video, working, it's inspiring. His ego has to be there.
Just to pick out a few things:
You have such lovely legs take your pants off.
(That would make my life if George took his pants off)
If your drummers a crack addict I'm going to throw him out of the band. He will suck the life out of everything.
What are we on, Much Music? No that was a few years ago baby. (I might cry. The good ol' days.
When George gave Much Music some credibility.)
Wonderful. Now what are you going to do?
You did well, now go on.
Once you give up, you're just waiting to die.
Oh the gauge...
I LOVE YOU RANDOM JOHN ON THE INTERNET! YOU FOUND MY SONG! YAY!

I think that's enough now.
Love,
Is it everything you thought it would be?

A second Rate JT: I'm Bringing Sexy back

That you are Chris Martin, that you are.
T-shirts. Easy.
Sitting down chilling.
Need ice cream.
Sit down with ice cream.
Max comes over.
I wanted to tell you ladies that you should probably not leave your seats after Coldplay sings Viva and Lost.
Ok...
Don't go to the washroom or go to buy beer or anything. Because we are blocking off the entrance to your seats. You see that black box over there?
Yeah...
There is a pretty good chance that the whole band might play 3 songs over there.
Serious?
There's a GOOD chance.
OMG I LOVE YOU MAX!
Then he took our picture.ATL KIDNAPPED!??!?! What?!?!?
http://www.myspace.com/alltimelow
I'm proud of them boys. Good way to stick it to them!
So you probably won't. But it keeps changing. So you don't know. Well no matter what happens. I will always wish that it was you with me. Because you are amazing. Too amazing for words.
There are holes in the thighs of my two favourite pants. Fuck that. I really need new pants... Sigh...
Are you persuasive?
Uhm I'm not really sure. I mean I believe in dressing for success and that if people have a positive opinion of you they are more likely to work with you.
That's a form of persuasion.
Well then yes.
Yeah, I could tell that. You are also very articulate.
Thank you.

So apparently my perfect career is a PR person. That's pretty rad. Won't lie. And I can still go the music route. I think she said his name is Bill Allen. I don't recall. But anywho. He apparently does what I would be good at. He advises musicians such as Bryan Adams and Anne Murray about what is best for them and how they should present themselves. In more simpler terms, my job would entail telling Jacob Hoggard when it is inappropriate to not be wearing pants. I'm hoping he grew up with this record. It seemed to be going that way from what I've heard.

More reason to love these kids.


So apparently I can go to MR and they'll like format the program to what I want. Which is pretty sweet. And I can tell them I want an internship and stuff with certain people or at certain places and they will try and set it up. Which is sweet.

You had a mental breakdown yesterday. No worries. I just know that you scaring yourself away from this is bad. As much as it breaks my heart you need to and have to go. It's what is best for you.

I love this song so much. It's an academy winning song. And yes I loved this song before it was on SYTYCD. Who do you think I am?


Holy shit it's 7? When did that happen?

Gob is on it's way. So is Red Jumpsuit. Passing off both of them.

Cleaned room. Exciting. Need new pillows. Need new pants.

First person to comment on my hair. Ms. Gomez. Story of my life. And then Angela. As soon as I open the door. OMG I LOVE YOUR HAIR! I've only seen this girl 3 times in my life. Hahaha.

Choreo a song right now. I'd love to do it next year but I don't know if it's on Ed's list of no no's.



I hate Amy Spanger. I fully believe she's the reason no one is taking Constantine seriously in this role when he actually does a really good job. I love how C actually holds his hand in guitar position like he's holding a pick. That's hilarious.

Sad Pushing Daisies is over. He was pretty cute. See I don't just like emo's Daivd! GAWSH!

Cannot think of movement for long note. Rawr. My brain I hate you.
Just kidding.

Ok I'm done rambling.

Love,
Streetlight People

I Have This Meeting Tomorrow

And I think I finally understand that song. Jizz in my pants.
Look at this.

http://www.fullsail.edu/

They actually have the music business BA! OMG! OMFG! And it's only a year course. OH MY LIFE!

Tuitions only 31300. Mere dimes and nickles. *insert nervous laughter* Well it's nice to actually have a dream. Now those other schools look more realistic.

So actual schools of interest Trebas (Montreal or TO), Harris Institute (I believe TO again), Metalworks (Mississauga) and The Pacific Audio and Visual Institute (Vancouver). I think I'm going to ask a few of these places to send my books. Well now I have something to talk about with Miriam tomorrow. I need to figure out if at PAVI I have to take the film business portion of it... And I want to know if Metalworks also teaches basic sound board like PAVI. The Harris is a lot more of the creative business side, like music videos. I look into it.

Oh life....

WHO WANTS TO GO TO FLORIDA!?

YAY!!!!

If You KNow A Way Out Then I'd LIke To Go with You

Ever have that moment. Where a song just comes on. And you just know it. It's like you were born to that song. And you feel you've known the words all your life. And it just makes you move. Even if it looks like you're seizing.

Well that's my life.

I hope there's a fall tour in the works.

Fuck Yeah We Can Live Like This

I wanted to quote a very famous man.
But I cannot seem to recall that line that travels through my brain waves all day. Especially when my head bounces with a million other things.

When they said you was high class,
Well that was just a lie.

At the end of the interview they asked me if I was egotistical. I said have you not been spending the last hour with me, talking about me?

I miss those two a lot. They became like my family. But like all families at one point they will leave you to your own devices.

After you break up with her, call me. Well I did the first part. But today I was just totally drained. Plus this is going to be an intense week coming up. Kind of.

There's one room for the A and R guys' party. When I'm one of those guys I'll be out in the parking lot in the mosh pit. Not at the party inside. Lame. But not really.

I'm not really sure what's been said. Nor do I really care. Honestly. It's sad that I think this way. That I must thoroughly think through all these situations. That I do try that hard. Word of the day: Appeasement

Today was weird. Standing there. You've become a new person. I'm really not sure what to think of it. Well one thing is for sure I'm fucking pissed at her for not answering and even more pissed at you for not calling. You know you don't have to put up the front with me. I will call you a cab and pay for it. Honestly. That's fucking ridiculous. He's the adult here. I don't think he realized how much shit he got himself into. I walked away today because there becomes a point where I'm done. I just don't want to even hear it. There were several times during the test today where my thoughts interrupted and caused me to pause.

I am everyday people.

You want to know why you don't deserve the truth? Because it will shatter your whole world to know how it really is. Welcome to the real world. Where there are laws. And stalking is illegal.

There's this old couple who keeps phoning our house looking for a woman. Like if we know where she is at all. It's really sad. I feel sad for them. I wish I knew where she was. But maybe there's a reason.

Q: Can I meet you at the show?
A: Duhhh… you guys make the effort to come out, the least we can do is meet every single one of you!

@alltimelow your album sucks - nothing personal

I love the beginning of Thriller till the drums kick in. And not the Michael Jackson version.



This made me love Broadway again.



It kind of made me love life again.

I think I was lost for a long time, and when I thought I had found myself I truly hadn`t. I had been brain washed by more than a few people. And it took some loving friends of mine to see that. Thank you. They all told me but it took me a long time to realize it myself. I got sucked in.

Royal Pains. Good show.

Tyler Kyte. Omg was that cute. Oh the early years.

Love,
NO H8
Maybe one day we will not protest, we will celebrate!

But It's Gonna Be My Year

ATL JULY 7TH! I'm stoked! Apparently it might get leaked tomorrow... That's what Alex is saying. He's pissed.
They're working on the new music video. Which shall be hilarious like all their other videos.
Was going to go to school early but started watching The View then worked out. I need to go do my hair. And find some pants. The best pants party you've ever been too! Hahaha. That made my day.
For those curious I'm wearing boxers so get over yourselves.
I know some kids who wear just their boxers a lot. Hahaha...
You have to be there. You have never seen one of their shows. It's amazing. I will actually cry. Then I will kidnap you. And we will go together.
Anyways now I'm going to be late.
Love,
Nothing Personal

HOLY SHIT JAY!

Watching Jay stream live. If I sleep through my test tomorrow we know why. Talking on chats. Hahaha.
Once again how people mistake brilliance for plagiarism.
And when the clock strikes twelve, they go home to another man.

Stress Level: 2

For some reason I'm really not concerned. I mean these things are never on specifics.
Good day out in the sun with some free pudding.

Actually it's Adam Brody Bitch. He would laugh so hard at that.
I wanted to find the pudding scene but all I can find is it in like another language. Lame.
We NEED another Adam Brody, spring roll night.
Luck comes with hard work.
Went to bed early. Woke up early. Might retire early again.
Excited for not having to rush on Wednesday. But still sad about that...
The things I wish I could say.


After the downfall where do we turn. You had a streak of luck. A strange claim to fame. And now do people even know your name?


Might go out by myself tomorrow after test. I enjoy being out on my own. It's weird. I'm like that. I remember I went to the mall once by myself and realized how much more peaceful it is. I'm a strange cookie. I love being around people but I love just being with myself.
Say the joke. Say it. I bet they all have a poster of Pete Wentz on their wall. The music I love, won't always be the music that gets signed. I would say which and who but then it would just piss other people off. So what's the use? I love supporting local music but I always know that they just won't make it. The amount of music A and R guys receive daily that all sound exactly like the music 'we all' listen to is crazy. And not everyone can get signed.
Speaking of which where should I get a job for September? And when should I tell my parents I want to go to a school for 18500? Hahaha.... Ooops.

http://www.noh8campaign.com/
Amazing.
I'm so excited for this.
I might cry in his presence. It's gonna be intense.
http://www.myspace.com/skate4cancer
After all the rain, there comes a better day. We'll push past all the trouble in our lives.
Just so you know I'm second guessing everything now because I'm kinda trying to avoid you. That's how mature I am. But other than that, much like the noh8 I will put duct tape over my mouth.
We all dream about love.
Luke Pickett. Now there's a man who deserves success. But it won't happen on Vibe.
It seems to be death and bad fortune that shape us.
Sometimes the rain won't stop. Still I can see, I breathe, I can feel myself staying afloat.
She says her pain won't stop.
Well it's the same old struggle.
On my own. It scares me. But I cannot wait. It's going to be good.
Walking down Stephens Ave last night I realized a lot. Warm summer breezes can do that to a person.
How this has gone from one thing to another.
See what happens when you just don't post for like an hour and keep the window open to continuously type?
How I cannot wait for that better day.
Thanks for reminding me S.

I'm thinking one day during Stampede for a Coke show I don't really care about I might go buy myself a rush ticket to the Chucks. Cause I can still catch the concert later.
Carreer Thingy wednesday. Should be interesting.
Anyways I'm gonna post this now so I can watch all the videos I've posted. Hahaha....

Tonights Gonna Be A Good Good Night

Tonights the night, let's live it up.

Barnum. Will be hilarious. Vertigo theater has a beautiful lobby, under the tower. Apparently gay-ness is coming! YAY! GAY KIDS! We're looking into chilling in Kensington for a little bit. Speaking of I need to do my hair. ELAINE WHEN THE FUCK ARE WE LEAVING?!!? Elaine says 6... That gives me time to do hair and get to sunnyside. that means I have to leave at like 5. That's in 40 minutes.... Fuck...

Elaines peeing... You needed to know that. My makeups missing. Rawr.
I need to find headphones and a purse and nylon socks! AH! Elaine stop peeing I have to go get ready!!!!

This is what goes through my hed all the time. I thought I'd share.
Ugh can't see Evil Dead on Wednesday cause of Coldplay. Cause I'm that cool.
I really want to find other shoes where you can see my lovely toes. I need bright blue shoes... I need to work on finding these.... Maybe I'll go look at some Fergie shoes. Adam Lambert loves them. New CD in the fALL! STOKED!
Go out and smash it! Jump off that sofa!
CRAP I NEED TO CHARGE CAMERA! RAWR

Mazal Tov!!!

That Song

Reminds me of Will. And all that other shit. Which makes me laugh. And makes me want to go listen to some Alleyways even more. I'm so tired.
It said I had a new message. Apparently not. Epic fail.
This however. Its golden.

Hey:) tyhank you very much for the kind words!

school is almost done ?

exam went good! glad to hear!:)

tyhanks for taking the time to listen,

your time to us means everythinig,

thank you!:)

we are glad:)

hopefully you are having an amazing day! :)

*I respond*

best thing you can do is smile!:) :):):)

ahah

I won't pull my cards yet.
The accents not THAT bad...
You only wish you knew.
You finally see the light and everything changes.
I'd say it but where would that get the world?
Girls went downstairs hopefully I cleaned up my laundry. Fuck...

Love,
More Than A Fighting Chance

Time For Some Alleyways and Cookies

Judy:
{spoken} If I want to have an affair, or smoke pot, or do M&M's, you can't stop me

Almost funny how you waltzed in here assuming I'd come back
Well let me tell you something, you are way off track
Can't you see I'm different, or are you still that blind
No - you stand right there and take it, there's no love to hide behind
I am proud to tell you, I'm really doing good
I'm sure a whole lot better than you ever thought I would
Got my own place, my own space, where I can dream and plan
It took me this long to realize I do not need a man

{spoken} Well, certainly not you

I used to need you, then I finally learned
I used to want you, not the tables turned
I used to love you, now it's your time to squirm
Cause I'm saying goodbye and I won't pray for your return
So get out and stay out, I've finally had enough
Don't kiss me on your way out, it wouldn't move me much
You used me, abused me, you cheated and you lied
So get out and stay out, I'm taking back my life
I wonder what you'll do now that I'm not around
Now that your new love has up and left you down
You've always come crying to me throughout the years
To mend another's broken heart, to dry another's tears
So get out and stay out, I'm moving on at last
Cause I've been so foolish, but that was in the past
I never thought I'd be the one to say goodbye
So get out and stay out, I'm taking back my life

Dreams and plans are in the making
Success is out there for the taking
Wish it was as simple as it sounds
I have no choice I have to do it
Face the future, walk into it
No that I'm unfettered and unbound

Get out and stay out, I've finally had enough
Don't kiss me on your way out, it wouldn't move me much
You used me, abused me, you cheated and you lied
So get out and stay out, I'm taking back my life
My life

I love this show... And this man...

I No Longer Have A Grad Date or A Best Friend

I almost cried today. But I didn't. Because I know we will stay in touch. Maybe we'll move in together next year. Anyways I'm planning on going there sometime before October, you're coming back in November, I'm going there in February. So we'll see each other. Doesn't mean I don't want to cry. You are like the only sane person I have left. Glad you enjoyed the present I left you today. Sorry I made you cry. You say that love goes anywhere, but in your darkest times it's just enough to know its there.
Hair feels good. Hands feel good. Feet feels good.
Stressful day. Emotions on high. Kinda scared after school there. Mother yelling. Good times.
I love that actor. He's in like all their videos and Maroon 5's. Trying to find the new Shinedown video. Apparently it's really funny.
Noticed yesterday in I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, Janice started screaming about Prop 8 which was a month ago almost now and how she's sorry she couldn't be there. Isn't the show live? Just some food for thought.
Yesterday was pretty cute Dom, but I also wanted to gag. You sang You Picked Me just so you could point at her and earn brownie points. You're such a tool. I love it.
Also when two guys hug, it makes my day. Because you barely ever see it and when you do it's comforting I guess.
Really felt left out today. That's cool. Whatever. Your was the first comment I read and had a lump in my throat the rest of the day. No one else's mattered after that.
Next year is going to be so weird. It scares me. But as soon as it's over I won't be able to wait.
Talked to Bustin yesterday which was extremely random.
Your 18 now... Looking at pictures really makes me think a lot about what I used to think.
I'm so tired.
People are coming over at midnight.
Need to set up garage.
Need to wake up early.
Need to bake baked goods for Cristina, since I promised when she got me tickets. Love it.
Interesting talks with interesting people today. Bennet actually. And a few others.
Cameron I loved your video. Sad I can't make it tomorrow. But we all need to get together to watch our movie you made about random scary stupid shit. It'll be great. I gotta say I was less offended being able to see it all together in the finished project. fight butin!
Love you,
And Adam Lambert
(20/20 tonight!)

Please? Can I have just one?

I can't wait for this summer.
I'd prefer the one to the right of the photo...
Shut up David. I will totally find me an emo boy. Shut your face prince of the douches.

You can tell me how vile I already know that I am.

I'll grow old and start acting my age. I'll be a brand new day in a life that you hate.
Forgot about that. Thanks J.
I want to be a bitch to her but you wouldn't. Ugh I hate you and your appearances.
I love when we're friends. You are actual the most stable friend I have.
Haircut on Monday. Thank Jesus. Hi. Not you...


Heard this song the other week. It's great but when the song kicks in the music needs to be half a beat faster. It kills me everytime I hear this song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_2rrxONlLo
However, Will.I.Am is such a smart musician. It's crazy.
Organized all the tickets. Looks good now.
Uhm you really shouldn't have said that. Never mind the tone and look on your face.
It's not going to happen.
So when you dump her, call me and we can be friends. HAHAHA! I love you.
Sausage and cheese tomorrow.
Jump off that sofa.
Last night I ran. Holy shit I ran. It was like sweat running off your face, dripping. It felt great. 1.75 miles in 20 minutes. I'm pro. Not actually. When we go camping in Kananaskis I'm going to use that time wisely. I'm excited.
Barnum Saturday. Let's get high and watch. Uhm I'll just watch.
Don't think I'm going to movie marathon. :(
Garage Sale Saturday morning! Score!
And then we'll do it again.
I was looking at photos of PIAU. And reading stuff from the students. And they're apparently looking for more women at their school. HOLLA!
So glad I'm done with that on Friday. Shit I guess I still have obliged times to be with those people. Hahaha. Ok wait are these the friends we don't like or which? Hahaha. I'm going to miss those guys a lot... Her legs are shiny... Whoa...
Gotta do the workout video today. Sometime.
Omg lunch today was fabulous. I pampered myself. Blueberry yogurt, cottage cheese, sushi and cherries and green tea. I love myself.
People truely need to give themselves more love. Honestly. You'll be so much happier with yourself.
I don't even need to look sideways. I don't need that bond. I've never made an effort to have one. I need the network of fun. That's what I need. I love the fact that if you can't, there's two people that already want it. That's amazing.
Woke up to sweaty balls. That makes me laugh.
Adam Lambert. Rolling Stone. Jizz in my pants. HAHAHA! It's actually amazing. I love how we had that moment the other day in the washroom. S wasn't here today. That made me sad. :( I love her. Wow, you actually like him. Yeah I do. One day I will find his straight counterpart. yes you will, especially in the music industry. Thanks. That reminds me need to email Miriam. I love how she can tell me that and how people just seem to always tell me things they shouldn't tell anyone.
Tonights going to be a good night.
Chemisty. Didn't do that bad. About 6% higher in the tests than the class average. Is that chicked I smell?
Love,
I already know what I am.