Holy Shit They Just Made A Show About My Life!

I had heard about Glee but wasn't sure what it was. I clearly pissed the sneak preview. But that is okay.
Also that last song Don't Stop Believing - Journey. Iconic. Now listen up bands. That is the best song to play once your set is done and the speaker music comes on. Iconic.

Stereos

These guys were on disband. Were signed by A & R rep Matt or Mark, can't recall, for Gene Simmons, for Universal.
They've had struggles but have recently had triumph.
I swear to god I know that one kid. He looks way toooooo familiar.
Band from Edmonton. They make me dance at 4 am.
This is their first music video! HOLLA!


I like to think they're a mix of forever the sickest kids and maybe not metro station but something like Cash Cash.... Hmm.... I love that this is the new sound coming up! WOOT!

Uhm I'm Mentally Insane?

Talkitive today. Lots are. That's exciting.
Bon fire cancelled on account I had to babysit my 10 year old brother.
Poop deck. Hahaha. Literally.
Working with MCS would be fucking amazing. So jealous of their lives. Maybe one day I can be friends with them? I like sushi! <3
Chopping up a love, kills. I would know. Next weekend there may be chopping. Oh Saturday how you will give me them awkward butterflies.
Definately just remembered my dream from last night. We were in the school theater. Do a show of some kind? And my uncle O was the there. It was weird. And it was Friday because Colin was wearing what he was wearing on Friday and I was wishing him a happy early birthday. Then I kissed Colin on the cheek which is not unusual. Haahaha. You'll get over it eventually. And then everyone thought we were dating like usual. That's all I remember. Good stuff. I just remember it was really messed up.
Where did I find that thing? And why has it since poofed? Rawr. Life.
Seagulls travel through time??!?! WTF?!?!?!?!
You look like such an ass. I love you.
Do you understnad how much it kills a person to sit outside a HOB and eat dinner at the restaurant across the pathway? Kills.
Watched SYTYCD, Thursday Episode. They went to Seattle. The PAramount Theater where they held the auditions is kitty corner from the hotel we stayed at. Can you say ballin?
Woke up at 2:30 today. Lol. I was tired man. Then I worked out for like an hour and a half. Good stuff.
I gotta say his clothes do look good on you. People complain that they don't even recognize you anymore. But it's because you've grown up. It's not that bad. I just worry about the temptations that surround you.
Damn you looked good in that dress girl. Your hair was pretty!!! And that dress was just totally you! You were the Belle of the Ball in my books.
Did Miley and what's his face finally break up? Rawr. Some new music for myself that I stumbled across. All this stumbling I do is unhealthy...

Also did you get some free vicodin? Cause I downloaded myself some.
This song makes me smile:

Don't Let Your Feet Touch The Ground
http://www.myspace.com/ashkoley
Don't think this was the song I was looking for but HEY! Who cares!

Maybe that was the song I wanted, it just wasn't the same without the boy dancing. Hmmm...
Love Cartel.

What an amazing dancer! The stamina is amazing! Wow.

Oh god I love this song. Even more with this dancer. HOLY MOLY!

Oh no not the motivational walking. gets me eerytime!
Oh no now I'm watching lyrical dances trying to choreograph without you. I want to do that song next year in mt. Meh we'll seee. It's always good just to release the creative juices.
Love,
I'm getting a how to use a sound board degree.

I Guess I Should Record This For Psychiatric Reasons

Not as bad as the shoulder eye thing. But who knows. I thought my subconscious was over this.
Ok so there's a few shady bits, and some stuff I remember rather clearly.
Ok so for some reason we were all living together. And by we I mean me and the two guys. Which is weird. And we were living in my house. Then we went out to get something. When we came back Reno was here. Which is weird. And then the guys wanted to see him but he started attacking C, but was chill with S. So me and S sat outside with him. Then we were at like a movie. But I think it was like a drive-in movie. Idk that's where it gets fuzzy. But it was the three of us. There wasn't any talking. It was like that movie we saw about Sylvia! You could only hear somethings but other stuff was just back ground noise. Then S and I were on the train. And he realized whatever. Then everyone was on the train. And Ash complained about 7th rain while Ryan was sitting beside her. And anna got off the train, then when the train stopped in the middle of nowhere, we saw her on a far off platform and then she wass randomly on the train again. Then S and I went to talk away from everyone. But I couldn't hear. And why weren't we in his car. Wtf dream?
Then I was with the guy that is the universal A and R rep for Gene Simmons. And then we showed up at the door of the house that was on reaper and when we knocked some lady answered. I don't know who she was though. But I was trying to get her to like him. Because I did. And she was like he looks like a taller, manlier version of S. And then I really can't remember anything after that. I don't know it was weird. Whatever.
Over.

We're So Close To Something Better Left Unknown

UP! Go see it. I don't care what you are doing right now. Go fucking see it. Don't take your kids. GO by yourself. Bring some chocolate. Some tissues. He was her adventure. Her paradise. Then he learned what needed to be. And then he left the chairs there. That was so sweet. Everything about it just tore me to pieces.
Then since it was Pixar the original short was mah-valous! It was called Slightly Cloudy. The stork and the rain cloud. Just so adorable.
I'm emo. Get over it.
Tomorrow's your birthday. Be expecting something. Hopefully. If my connections work out properly...
Might have issues with going tomorrow. We'll see what happens.
News of a thing. Huh. I'll look into it.
It was nice outside today. Vitamin D always feels good.
Really tired.
Jay's final night. Tis sad. You will be missed. Till you move on down to prime time.
I think it's interesting. I mean everyone has things bad. But everyone's bad things are always interesting. I'd rather have the rare meat than the uncooked potato.
What the hell am I talking about?
Why am I still talking.

Back when you used to be invisible
What was it like sitting in the dark
Remember what had been

Lonely hours, only thinking
Not to think at all
Just stay quiet, Stay inside
Let everything fall

Why Is My Brain Screaming Right Now?

Interesting day. Gave me lots to think about. It truly did. Between those two boys and that girly. It made me realize a lot about other people and myself as well. Part of me wants to tell you. The other part knows better.
Because I'm leaving you tonight. Tonight. Tonight.

This boy wants to play
There's no time left today
It's a shame coz he has to go home
This boy's got to work, got to sweat
Just to pay what he gets to get left all alone

Let's step outside
Let's go for a ride just for a while
No we won't get caught
Well that's what I thought until we cried

I'm still here
But it hasn't been easy
I'm sure
That you had your reasons
I'm scared
Of all this emotion
For years I've been holding it down
For years I've been holding it down

This girl tries her best every day
But it's all gone to waste
Coz there's no one around
This girl she can draw she can paint
Likes to dance she can skate
Now she don't make a sound

We'll play in the park until it's too dark for us to see
Well we'll make our way home
With mud on our clothes
She won't be pleased

For years I've been holding it down
And I'd love to forgive and forget
So I'll try to put all this behind us
Just know that my arms are wide open
The older I get the more than I know
Well it's time to let this go

I got to let it go
I got to let it go
I got to let it go
I got to let it go

Was going to have an interesting weekend. Lots of stuff changed. Gonna be kicking it up this weekend. Movie tomorrow. Bon fire Saturday night. Sunday Gay Film Festival. Know what I'm wearing kinda. Need to decide which for which day. 30 degrees tomorrow! Holy shit! Now I need to redress. But we're going to the theater... Rawr. Life.
My brain hurts so much right now. It's actually pounding. Still need to do Social homework.
Oh my brain... This is bad...
Love,
Cause honestly, I'm not that strong.

This Just Happened

When your bones feel heavy
And your heart is tired
Where you gonna go
What will be there
when you turn, around
Is there anything left
Do you need something more
No, that's not what you're looking for

One foot in, the other out the door
Your bags are packed, have you been here before?
You know what it's like being left behind
But are you really going to let that happen this time

I guess it's, Just that, time of year
The story's so simple
I don't want to hear
You're leaving again
What else is new
It's always gonna, be about you

One foot in, the other out the door
Your bags are packed, have you been here before?
You know what it's like being left behind
But are you really going to let that happen this time

One foot in, the other out the door
Your bags are packed, have you been here before?
You know what it's like being left behind
But are you really going to let that happen this time
Happen this time...

No more words
Not even goodbye
The story's over now
No, you better not cry

That Little THING With Her Head Held So High

This video is priceless! Matt you are amazing. Such a shy cutie did this? Hard to believe. Also please don't get frosted tips. Amy and I will protest. Oh god did Matt just rub his nipples? That innocent boy just changed my whole perception of him. Wow... I'm having a moment here. We feel bad for Ian he never gets as much love. WE LOVE YOU IAN! We looked for you but you were gone.
Now my spiel on Josh.
The things you have conquered. Watching an old video like this, is proof of how amazing your everyday struggle is. You are winning. You are no longer just surviving. You look so much healthier. It's amazing. I'm so glad there is a musician like you out there. Right now you are co-writing with Faber. What I would give right now. To be in your stude. I can't even express how much I love your words, and melodies and how everything is so intricately plotted.

I never took you for a trick but
sometimes I don't know what you want
I can take it if you need to
take this out on someone

That little BITCH with her head held so high
talking tough when I
cut myself so I could feel something I know is not a lie

That one stings a little
I'm always in the middle
I don't expect but try me
And you will always find me here
This is where I scream from

You can take it all away and I'll miss
There's a little bit of you in all this
And you can say you only think you know, yeah
Please, there's a better bit of me to see yet
Cause you haven't seen any of my best
You know I hate myself without you now

ya,Hurts the same when nobody knows
I guess that's just how it goes
And I won't say anything at all

I was talking on a dollar sign
anxious, scared of what you need
Everybody wants a piece of you
Everyone takes a piece of me

That one stings a little
I'm always in the middle
I don't expect but try me
And you will always find me here
This is where I scream from

ya,You can take it all away and I'll miss
There's a little bit of you in all this
And you can say you only think you know, yeah
Please, there's a better bit of me to see yet
Cause you haven't seen any of my best
You know I hate myself without you now

ya,Hurts the same when nobody knows
I guess that's just how it goes
And I won't say anything at all

This is the hook
Take it like you took
I'm shaking like I shook before
Never ever getting better off
and I can only watch
This is where I stopped before
Not another piece of me
I always slip away from
I always slip away from

I won't say anything but
ya,You can take it all away and I'll miss
There's a little bit of you in all this
And you can say you only think you know, yeah
Please, there's a better bit of me to see yet
Cause you haven't seen any of my best
You know I hate myself

Hurts the same when nobody knows
I guess that's just how it goes
And I won't say anything at all

I won't say anything at all
I won't say anything at all

Knowing what I know now. Makes everything seem so much more... amazing, for lack of a better word. You'll never be somebody clean.
Love,
The road home, is paved with star fuckers requiem! I can never go, go back home again...

This I Am Excited For

And it better stay like this.
I stroked Cameron's leg today. It was so that he wouldn't wear that green sweater anymore. It was all for his best interest to help him get laid. HAHAHHAHAHA!
Lots of sanitizer was used, trust me.
I hate hypocrites. Even though I am one.
Noticed today I was being silent for I realized how different I am. But hey that's ok. Are you creative? Do people often call you different? Tell me about it.
Mr. E was my person yesterday in the massage train and wow that felt good. He's really good at massages. Not everyone can say that about their teacher. That's why I love theater. Age or status is never a factor, except in Summerstock.
KD crackers are gross.
Tomorrow at 6:45 am I will kill Mr. E. Just kidding. I just really don't want to be there tomorrow morning.
Watched video. You should watch.
YOU NEED TO WATCH!
http://perezhilton.com/2009-05-27-may-26-2009
ACTUALLY?!?!?! That's sad...
http://perezhilton.com/2009-05-27-idol-controversy-att-cheats
Here is the timeline:
http://www.latimes.com/news/national/politics/la-gmtimeline-fl,0,5111111.htmlstory
Love,
NOH8

2010!

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-ed-marriage27-2009may27,0,2416956.story
Sam and I will be there for this one! I swear my life on it!
Just finished watching MILK. I am in such a state of emotion right now. It is intense. Looking at photos of the march happening right now makes me bawl. The movie was splendid. Props go out to actors portraying Harvey, Scott and Cleave! I really enjoyed the fact that they showed him being assassinated. It wasn't like you heard a shot from outside the door, or the door closed on them and the credits rolled. Oh no! It was absolutely amazing! It deserved more Academy awards then it got!
For some reason right now this song means sooo much.

You can still be with the Wizard
What you've worked and waited for
You can have all you ever wanted:

(spoken) I know:
(sung) But I don't want it -
No - I can't want it
Anymore:

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

I'm through accepting limits
'Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down:

There's no fight we cannot win
Just you and I
Defying gravity
With you and I
Defying gravity
They'll never bring us down!

So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky!
As someone told me lately:
"Ev'ryone deserves the chance to fly!"
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who'd ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am
Defying gravity
I'm flying high
Defying gravity
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!
Ahhh!

I love the people I know. And the simplest things they will do that mean the world. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! I couldn't figure out what to do. But this will be grand!
xoxoxo P!
You just climbed the totem pole.

Adam Lambert: I was not born fabulous

Survival Guide To The End Of Civilization As We Know It

Sorry George but civilization already ended today.
http://www.cbc.ca/thehour/blog/2009/05/survival_guide_for_the_end_of.html
I'm so disappointed. They merely took the easy way out.
Come on people these are human rights! God did not say marriage was to be of a man and a woman. But he did say everyone was created equal.
Glad I did that today. Showed me a lot about people.
John told me that we should exterminate homosexuals. And do to them what Hitler did to the Jews. But Hitler did do that to them so I'm not really sure if he was thinking properly. AT ALL!
However first thing in the morning. Walk in. Sheen and Becca sign. Sam says God made marriage a precious gift between man and woman and that shouldn't be changed. Scott said he's sad to say that it's not going to happen. The shirt was up for signing, I figured everyone knew, but no one took a stand. No one stood there to be judged. That's fine. Walked into green room. Cameron: What's your shirt say? *shows* Can I SIGN IT?!?! Yeah! This is amazing what you are doing right here. You are raising awareness! Scott thought I was bi. That's chill. I believe everyone's bi, but some people cause us to lead differently to either side. Scott showed them leaning towards the right side. And I thought that was interesting. Since Liberalism is the left side. Clearly showing us that we have constantly been taught that the conservative ways are the RIGHT ways. Soon that will all be changed. We will look back and see how ridiculous this fight was. I wish I were there right now. With everyone. Waving a flag. How much people must be ridiculed everyday? I simply wore a shirt today saying I supported an end to Prop 8 and you should have seen the way people started looking at me. It made me disgusted in the human population.
Love to everyone who is out there right now fighting the fight! One day we will be free of these chains!

Love,
But It's Different When It's Your Life

Everyday

The hate you must succumb to everday I can barely imagine. Just read your post. The comments so hateful brought tears to my eyes. I don't even want to think about them... My love is with all of those marching tomorrow!

Right now there are four acceptprop8 posts on Twitter. From 3 users. The amount of rejectprop8 posts has probably reached a million. This is amazing. Why is no one else up watching history happen? There's no way I'm gonna get any sleep tonight. I love everyone and everything! 11 am tomorrow! I cannot wait!!!!!!!! 12 hours and 11 minuutes!

The amount of love right now has brought tears to my eyes. This is absolutely astonishing!
I can't believe I will be sitting in class tomorrow during this...

WHY AREN"T I THERE?!?!?!

I want to be at a rally so bad tomorrow! I wish I could be there. But know my love and support is with everyone. We will make this happen. Everyone deserves to live equally and love whoever they want. Love knows no boundaries.
Waiting for more posts. Mark is killing me right now. But the amount of support is amazing!
I will know the moment it happens tomorrow. Trust me.
Sent a message on FB to the guys. Hopefully we can organize something. That would be absolutely amazing. I would be indebted to them forever!
Love to everyone!
Keep the positive attitude! If we cannot celebrate tomorrow, we will picket. We will stand up for ourselves. One day I will be standing physically there with the rest of you! If not tomorrow, one day soon this will happen. Love to everyone!

PROP 8!!!!

PROP 8 IS TOMORROW! We should know the votes by 11am!!!! I am so excited. If I didn't have school I would fly down there and be with you guys tomorrow! VOTE NO!
GIVE RIGHTS! GIVE EQUAL RIGHTS! EVERYONE DESERVES TO BE EQUAL!
SPREAD THE LOVE!
SAY NO THE PROP 8!!!!!

UBER COOL!

Jessica Where Have You Been?

Well folks today was the day for premiers! I needed to watch MOD! DUH!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nK4MwL5p_o
Why does it make so much sense? I have a lot to thank you for.
Jo Bros new vid. I love Joe with curly hair.
Susan Boyle.
Not as impressed as I once was.

Hmmm nothing yet....
Still watching. New things happen everyday.
Katie almost died this morning because of his hair. I was laughing so hard.
I'm so fucking pissed off at you right now!!!!!! UGH! I thought he was straight edge!? WTF?!?!? It's not a good night when you take E by accident and forget what happened with your boss. Actually I'm pretty sure you do remember, you just failed to mention it. I'm really worried now for this weekend. I know that I can be strong now, but I worry about you so much!
Also I love m card! It's ghetto. It's my style now.
Put the hat on! Fine. Yeah you look Indie. Told you. Are you surprised?
It was a relax day from the workout with yoga and stuff. So I ate healthy and watched tv all afternoon.
Watched Love Songs! AMAZING! All in subtitles. It's in French. Pretty much they were in a threesome. Girlfriend died. He became gay. It was amazing. I love it so much.
Hopefully I win the contest I'd like to go this weekend.
Hmmm had another video that needed posting but forget....
David's birthday! Happy Birthday Friend!
Talked with Telus. Guy liked me. Guy liked my moms loyalty. I now have free web and video streaming. Lol. Having issues connecting to twitter... Hmmm....
I love Twitter.
Oh god that's like the perfect emo scene concert for 14 year olds ever! I'm so going! Bring back the no body loves us eyeliner! YAY!
Jeremy your hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What happened to the fuzz ball?!?!?!
My life is over.
TWLOHA SHIRT! YAY!
So this summer I'm gonna be like OMFG ROB DYER I LOVE I WANT EVERYTHING! AND THEN I"LL BE LIKE NEED HELP?!?! I"LL HELP!!!! I FUCKING LOVE YOU!!!!
Yout hink if it is wednesday something would happen already.
Muffins taste good with icecream.
Don't sell yourself.
I can't wait till I bring someone like the photographer home. Mother will not be surprised. Once again working on the meeting male friends. LOL!
Caleb you're an interesting character. I'm not sure what to say about that..... HAHAHAHAHA!
Patrick I love you too.
Scott I dislike you touching Aly. It's actaully disturbing. That's the main reason.
Something interesting going on with GSQ. That's what I'm calling him. HAHAHAHHA!
Mr. P is sooo nice.
Also I want to help you but I don't know how. Intervention anyone? I'm not moving anywhere with you like that. Just so that's out there.
I want to get you that, but I don't think that will work out. So wtf am I supposed to get you. Guess I'm going boy shopping later this week. My favourite kind! YAY!
Is this going anywhere? Uhm not really. I'm glad you just wasted your time on this.
Love,
I'm not dying.
Ps. Emo boy singing makes me lol. It's all breathy and pitchy. HAHAHAHAHA!

Stellar!

Was That A Sexual Reference?

I do not hook up!
True facts.
The ghetto is sweet unless you're getting shot.
True facts.
One day Macchio will lose everything in a poker game.
True facts.
Success!
True facts.
Yoga makes one happy.
True facts.
You talked to their AGENT!?!?!?
Not a true fact.
I put the bottle down because I have too much talent.
True fact.
I will be strong next weekend.
True fact.
June 6th?
Debatable as a true fact.
Laughing at a play about bullies?
True facts.

It's About The Music says:
and then I'll be like HAHAHHA JILL AND IAN!
HAHAHA HAIRY_NESS
HAHAHAHHAHA DAMN I"M HOT
WhAT WAS I THINKING?
Elaine says:
HAHAHAHAHAHA i'm lonely
It's About The Music says:
shut up
we are not lonely
hhahaa

Now you know where the ghetto is and you can come over all the time.
True facts.
Jessica you were sleeping.
True facts.
Well want to hear a story?
True facts.
It's 1 am.
True facts.
You were sleeping.
True facts.
Ok it's 1:30am Imma hang up now.
True facts.
Jessica, I'm really scared to have sex.
HAHAHAHA TRUE FACTS!
But everyone I know is doing it.
True facts.
I'm going to Kelly Clarkson.
True facts.
I'm gonna spend 320 dollars.
True facts.
I'mma be in trouble again.
True facts.
Forgot to buy new headphones.
True facts.
Put out everything I will wear this week.
True facts.
Will be waking up at 6:15 am.
True facts.
John plays the shit out of pianos.
True facts.
Everyone at some time will think I'm dating Colin.
True facts.
Everyone at one time will doubt my sexuality.
True facts.
I will always know what's best for me.
True facts.
However I may not always do the best thing.
True facts.
Why haven't I gotten an email yet?
True facts.

Elaine says:
KAY SO THERE'S THIS SUPER CUTE INDIE GUY WITH PLUGS AND GIANT GLASSES AND A PORN STACHE THAT WORKS AT THE STARBUCKS BY MY SCHOOL
AND I SEE HIM LIKE EVERY DAY
AND TODAY HE CAME IN MY STARBUCKS
AND WE WERE BOTH LIKE LOLWTF
AND INTRODUCED OURSELVES
AND NOW WE'RE BFFZ
HAHA
too bad he was with something that could be either his girlfriend or sister and he's like 25
It's About The Music says:
YES!
Elaine says:
FML
It's About The Music says:
FML!
Elaine says:
probably girlfriend
I HATE EVERYTHING
HAHHA
It's About The Music says:
i hate life
all the cutie art kids are taken
FUCK!!!!!
Elaine says:
yeah man
I'd totally walk around kensington with that kid

It's About The Music says:
YAY KENSINGTON!
FUCK OK!
so i decided
that when we went to the house
the boy liked me cuz he gave me extra foam
cuz this time when i got it it wasn't as creamy and yummy
and that sounded extremely sxual
HAHAHHA
Elaine says:
too bad we're afraid of sex
HAHAHAHA

True facts.
I told Elaine everything goes up here.
True facts.
She was chill.
True facts.
Fuck your high class.
True facts.
I've found the cure.
True facts.
Not the band.
True facts.
I actually keep typing true facts instead of copy and paste.
True facts.
You and I will always rule the Lake with our Spitz.
True facts.
We need new friends.
True facts.
Attractive male friends.
True facts.
Who dress like that.
True facts.
Who aren't jerks.
True facts.
I don't know how to purposefully make friends.
True facts.
Are you one of her unattractive friends?
True facts.
Dude we're gonna live together this summer.
True facts.
Dude we're bandaids.
True facts.
Dude you keep saying dude.
True facts.
Dude I have to tell Angela about the agent.
True facts.
Hi my name is mark.
True facts.
I'm not excited for the new Phoenix album.
True facts.
We should make pancakes together.
True facts.
We're both looking for new friends.
True facts.
I might have lost my music book.
True facts.
Both music books actually.
True facts.
These strawberries are delicious.
True facts.
I'm not eating strawberries.
True facts.
If we all have such amazing lives, why do we twitter constantly?
True facts.
We should go have burrito's, red bulls, then Space Mountain it.
True facts.
I need to go back to the West coast.
True facts.
I'm thinking I might end up in Seattle.
True facts.
Watched Sleepless in Seattle.
True facts.
Realized I'd been to a lot of the movie locations.
True facts.
I don't come cheap.
True facts.
I don't need FB quizzes to tell me about myself.
True facts.
I'm having bra issues.
True facts.
This is a good ending.
True facts.

True facts.

Things Keep Changing

But I will always know. Always. I need to witness this. I wonder how you ever get anything done in the day always updating. I think I'm following progress on eight sites now? wow... That's H-core.
Also this is hot.

That's why she thinks Matt is hot. Ian would. Josh what a tool. I love it. Also wtf how did that girls dress not ride up. I love Josh. That is so low budget.
Quick name as many record companies as you can?
HAHAHAHA!
The turns life taalk.
take. Whatver
You were all AH! I was all you were out of cell service.
Hating Rain right now. Now sneak-a-peek is gonna be f'n packed! Frick!
Also since that day is only like late afternoon to midnight does that mean we don't work that day?
Hmmm....
You look so much hotter an a real emo kid.
White jacket is bad ass. I've come to realize I need one. Everyone's wearing black now. Life wtf? And they all have black jackets. Like pleasae some originality. Hahaha.
Oh I can't wait to continue living life.
My agent says... Hahaha...
Yes. that's a win.
I really need to stop tlaking.
Government agencies will be after me again soon.
Love,
Got in the street fight with the IRS

You'll Be There When I Prove Them Wrong

And honestly, I have been begging for answers
That you and only you can give to me
A voice crying loud
I've been crying for days now
And as I start to run, I stop to breathe
(And I was nearly scared to death)
And I was nearly scared to death
(Why you left in paragraphs)
Why you left in paragraphs
(The words were nearly over us)
The words were nearly over us
You stop and turn and grab your bags

And I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

As hours move to minutes
And minutes take longer to break
I will be desperately awaiting
But my tongue won't fall apart
And we've been sitting here for hours
All alone and in the dark

So let me think of how to word it
Is it too soon to say 'perfect'?
If I could find another thirty minutes somewhere
I'm sure everything would find me
All that's left is just to sing

I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

And if you sing to me sweet until then,
I may never sail Virginia again
And as this current moves slow for me, this much you must know...we'll meet again
And I will have you know I'm scared to death

Tell me once again that you will love me till the death
And should I die, you swear that you will come for me
As I fade away, you reach out your arms
(And please don't let me go)
And please don't let me go
(And please don't let me go)
And please don't let me go

And I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

adam lambert

On tuesday April 28th, adam lambert performed the song feeling good on american idol. I was watching. Freaking out about my solo the next day. Thinking about how I wanted to do this one song but was afraid to. Afraid of the aftermath. I was gonna take the safe way out. Adam walked down those stairs and stood proud. He sang it for himself, for everyone and he did it with a sense of pride. And it made me realize if he was gonna follow his dreams and his life on international television and not be jeopardized. I wasn't going to do it either. That's eventually what made me choose to sing the dark I know well. I will always think of adam and the inspiration he gives me. Seeing them all sit at the table you'd think he was the winner. It's ridiculous. Don't sign with Queen. You know that though. I'm not worried about you. You know yourself. You will rock this world. I can't wait.
Love,
To The Music, The Songs I Breathe, Feel, Know inside out. Everything that is a part of me.

"You see I'm one of those poor suckers you have music flowing through their veins. But that's okay because I'm doing what I know and need and it's amazing."
"Yeah... me too..."
A conversation from some years ago.

You Boys Are The Chillest

No shit uncomfortable threads. You're such a cutie. What you've gone through is needless to say inspirational.
Votte for MMVA's.

Based on photo hands down Josh. Based on album. Hands down Josh. Based on song. hands down Josh. Based on video? Tough. Why? Josh's video is adorable and so is he. Pierre's video makes me cry every time I see it. So which do you vote for? Well Josh. He won the msot categories and he was the one who asked me to vote.
ANYWAYS VOTE MT BITCHEZ!
Josh inspires me. Not as much as Adam.
Ooo I'll write that blurb now.. Hold on.

How Easily The Night Just Changed

Feeling talky night already. Then I read this.
I'm listening to the CD again.
Because you're out of cell service.
What am I going to do?
Everyone I love will soon be apart from me.
It will be interesting.
This made me think of two different people.
I hope you know you are one.
You always seem to do such amazing things for me.
I feel like I can never give that back to you.
Maybe one day.
Maybe everyday.
You've always been there.
Thank you so much.
A simple thank you can't even say enough.
You just seem to get the hectic-ness.
You're not my friend.
Nor do I see you as part of my family.
You're more like an out of body, normal part of my brain.
It's strange.
I love it.
I love you.

the dots on the ceiling

Vindicated - Dashboard Confessional
The Sound of Settling - Death Cab For Cutie
'A' Song - Hedley
Alison Wonderland - Hedley
I Want You To Want Me - Jacob Hoggard
This Boy - James Morrison
Live High - Jason Mraz
You be the anchor The Keeps My Feet on the Ground, I'll Be The Wings That Keep Your Heart In The Clouds - mayday parade
Tonight Tonight - Panic! At The Disco (bad version -> SORRY!)
Samson - Regina Spektor
Let Me Sigh - Robert Pattinson
I'm Not Alright - Sanctus real
Just For You - William Tell
Until The die I Die - Story of the Year
....Slowdance on the inside - taking Back sunday
What does it feel like to be as ghost? - Taking Back Sunday
Being Here - The Stills
Blue and Yellow - The Used
Ottoman - vampire Weekend
Light Up The Sky - Yellowcard
River Flows In Your - Yiruma

Track 8 is my favourite. It just seems... right.
When you take out the CD there's a heart. Also I must get to transferring everything into my huge song writing book now! WOOT! Love you!!!!!!
You're looking really good.
And I'll have you know that I'm scared to death.
I wish I could do all those things too. I never got around to the grilled cheese. That's depressing.
Arr The Rules:

No Breaking my shit
No fighting
No sex
No illegal substances
No feelings talks
No Loud noises
No trolling the host
Wear your patch
Attempt pirate talk
Tits of GTFO
Be Nice
Don't Spill.
Failure to comply will result in plank walking.
Just so you know we borke every rule excpet two if I remember the evening correctly.
Glad to hear you guys have writing going well.
Still don't know if I'm coming on Friday.
Grandpa is coming. that is exciting.
oooo I'm getting sleepy.
aerona dn Bryce had a passionate affair last night without me cuz i quit stock.
I still hate you for hating ht epumpkins. They kill. anywho I'm not making sense anymoee.

Love,
I'm feeling rough, I'm feeling raw, I'm in the prime of my life

This Needs To Still Be On

If they canceled it I'll cry. I'll also cry if she cancels. I love my buds.
What's 60 x 5? Anyone.. Uhm 300? Fuck... 60 x 4? 240. Except it'd be more like 70.
I think our trip this year shouldn't be for theater, I think we should go see Ellen! Ballin!
We be runnin out of cash. I'm on a mf'n boat!
New game, not quite sure yet. I'll know when I wake up tomorrow morning.
Elaine and I be chilling in the ghetto. Elaine spills everything and therefore has rage. Picture of the rule list eventually. Mainly tits or GTFO! And no feelings talks.
Playing n64. Nathan = jew = amazing = No I don't speak jewish = Jews taking over the world.
Pizza was amazing. Crave cupcakes make my soole! Elaine remembering all of Grease makes my life. Elaine seducing me while I'm dressed as a pirate makes me lol. Hitler rap makes me lol. Anchorman makes me lol. Ping pong sleeping makes me lol.
My back hurts.
Bought a shirt.
Really want something to eat... Maybe grilled cheese be on its way!
Loving the mix cd. can't stop it.
Will post the mix cd playlist later.
Mark I love you. Toy story is ballin. Space mountain is the shit. Let us go! WEEEE!!!!
Ear hurts. Uhoh. Not this again.
Love,
I'm on a mother f'n boat!

Scarf or No Scarf?

Mmmm I'm thinking scarf. I truely have no clue.
Bag is bursting.
Ridiculous amounts of candy are ready.
Stalking done.
Loving best friend ever. Done.
Those were expensive man... Now I don't know what to do at all....
Rawr.
Oh shit both Ian's are coming tonight. Elaine will die. I will rofl.
This is gonna be horrendous. I'm the only one staying, if I survive the night so we can discuss the awkward-ness. I'm going to feel really awkward tonight. I can't wait.
Shin splits. Shitty.
NIN all night long.
Bought Elaine a poser skull scarf. She'll love it. I saw it and was like WIN!
Makeup done. Changing of the clothes done.
Brushing of the teeth done.
Emails done.
Talking to Pete Wentz done. Not that he replied. Lol.
Abso-fucking-lutely loving my mixed CD!
I love you too bud!
It will be us soon. Trust-a-me.
UP!
Gotta go!
Gottta get scarf!
RAH!
Get to meet Jew Horse excited.
Fuck where have I heard this song before!
DAMN YOU!

Did you hear?

I'm in a race with Jacob Hoggard for first place asshole. It's a tight race. I might be winning.

TWO SONGS DONE! YAY!

Your a stubby little tree frog, my only attractive friend who dresses like a boy.
Hahahaha I'm a tell him that when we be jammin' later.
Ooooooo When is it being announced? It better not be during stampede. That would be dumb if they did that....
Music die hards or Groupies.
Fight with Scott today. Walked back to school. Whatever.
Need to make muffins.
Went out with Amy. Got fresh air.
Adam Lambert I love you. I'll talk about the inspiring story there later.
You just have guys falling all over you. But none of my friends are attractive... I'm going to remember that...
Now we're talking. I hate you.
Whatever.
What is this?
I need to figure this out.
MT was strange. whatever. I killed it.
I'm done writing.
This is shit.

Why Was Today So Amazing Otherwise?

Slept in. Felt good.
Chemistry we watched CSI. We be ballin.
Lock down was uneventful.
"Ok so there's Geordie and Paul" Those girls made my day especially since Geordie was standing right there. What a cutie.

Walked to Coop. Bought me some donuts and sushi. The sushi was sooo good. Omg. Made a friend waiting for Colin to open the door. He was smelly. Anywho. So watched Colin direct and act sushi. It was fresh and nummy... Spread the love of the donuts. Had so many, offered one to Caleb. He was like uh YEAH! Then he walked away with my donut. And about ten minutes later comes back into the green room pushing everyone out of his way and is like I need to hug you. I was like uh... So he gives me this hug. and is like I really enjoyed the donut, I needed it, you are my best friend now. He smelled good. Unlike smelly kid.

That was the highlight of my day. I mean no it wasn't. Pft... Balls. (Love you NPH! Drink beer in the shower! refreshing!)
I bitched out girls in MT. It was great. They didn't know their shit and weren't listening to Jessie.
CABO! CABO!
Performances tomorrow. Reminds me I have Vicki's iPod... oops...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id8pKHjWBok
Amazing.
Where was I...
Ok after class. All the girls are just stripping in the middle of the room as all the guys are just chilling. And Dom's like I need to go in the change room. I was like aww....
So just chilling in the green room. Start talking to Patrick about Hey Ocean and singing to the music. Then Cameron comes along and we talk. You hear that? No... That's the voice of an angel... HAHAHAHAHAHA! We have to record that. Come on!
We get back. Then Jeff's there. Me and Jeff are talking like we do. Then we hug. Then we hug. Then he goes you know you're at perfect hugging height. Walks around to tell everyone. Isn't she huggable? YEAH! HAHAHAHHAHAHA!
Why don't you have a bf? Oh fml...
I think I be making stuff for Friday. Depends on homework load tomorrow.
Been working out... again. But still gaining weight? Story of life.

I get a random text today:
Who is this???
Jessica, Who would this be?
403 ### Celia
How did you get my number?
You texted me first.
Oh, I'm sorry about that.
No Worries.
Hey just out of curiosity, what did I actually text you?
Something about anisin in anmore, I'm confused cause I did just tell someone I was stressed though LOL!
Hmm I don't remember that. Well I'm sorry. And hey don't be stressed. Smile.
LOL thanks!

It was a Vancouver number.
I love things like that.
Also I never sent a text along such lines. Which makes this more interesting...
Get my Stampede Letter.
Chill.
Mom's like oh this kids good. I look this kid up and he's the attractive guitarist. Holy shit!



It took him five years. Wow man. That's it. That is it right there.

I don't know what else to say after that.
Everything has been covered I think.
I'm sleepy.
Barely slept last night.
Shitty stuff.
Love talking to L.
Can talk to her about anything. It's chill.
Thinking about some stuff.
Watched Farrah's Story. Made me sad.

Love,
It's like twisted sister
If you don't know, get out.

Firstly Let's Get This Crap Out Of My System

DUDE! YOU JUST SANG WITH KISS!
In case you didn't, I wet my pants.
That was so hawt. I can't even explain. You can wear that later.
Who would you rather be, the Beatles or the Rolling Stones?
Dude Santana just high fived you. But it wasn't just a regular high five. It was a holy fuck you've got it, high five.
Dude then you sang with QUEEN! HOLY FUCK!! DUDE QUEEN! Who cares if Kris was singing too, you could barely hear him!
Dude you killed it. I love you. You are sooo talented. I pray that one day I will get to meet you.
It's okay that you didn't win. It is because you're going to do so much better than that. So many people don't even know who Kris is.
You deserved it though. You deserved that moment so much. I can't even express it.
It's okay I was in tears to. Trust me.
Gene Simmons will hook you up man. I mean he just wouldn't let anyone sing with Kiss because. Like seriously.
You will do great things.
Much greater things then another loverly.
Also why wasn't Drake there? He's such a cutie. You guys are cute together.
Prop 8- First week of June. We will get it done. We will finally all live equally.

What An Ass!

He deleted me. I don't remember deleting him. Ouch that stings. After I let you poke me. PFT! Whatever... Imma go find me a musician to photograph, to sell their soul and make millions. Now what?

I Need to Chill With These Dudes Again...

Everywhere I look, people I know are having babies. Maybe I should joins the club. Any takers??

ok... I mean no. Kids are bad. But I'd sleep with you.
What has my blog come to?

I've never known true bliss until I laid my lips on you, milky white vanilla chai drink... where have you been my whole life???!!
*Totally agreed.

Went to the drug store, got some spray bottle to flush out my ear... paid $25, came home and used the entire thing in 40 seconds. Still deaf
*Story of my life...

convinced Ben to go out! woot! I'm not allowed to drink though... need to wake up early. I may need moral strength.
Trav just motorboated mike's stomach
Ben just kissed my lips... They www surprisingly moist!
I totally just remembered I kissed Macchio on the lips last night. Uugh
I can assure you, it wasn't any better for me!

I think we should get married. Because reading about your day has brought the biggest smile to my face. I knew you were my favourite. Look good, feel good. All the stuff you do, I relate to. It's sad... We really need to be friends.

What the hell's up with 'Lost'? Why does everyone treat Daniel like a retard when he's obviously the only one with a clue????
*Someone who agrees!

http://twitpic.com/46kfg
*Marry me.

You put it in the microwave. Crap now I have cancer... I forgot plastic melts...

Downloading all possible Prince. Immersing completely for the next 2 days. I will become Prince
*princ eis the SHEIT!

This is worse than slow walkers at the mall!!!!!!!!!!!

Watching Paris Hiltons BFF UK!!! WOOT!
*Ok I'm actually dead serious now. Marry me.

Your stories about pancakes are so cute. We should make pancakes together one day and be sooo lost together about how it is one cooks them...
You are addicted to poker. Thats ok. I still love you.

Ed hardy shirt count: 42
*So jealous

Scheduling bands to see
*Prays to run into you at ACDC

Ok I'm dead serious. Let's get married. Drags, poker, drinking, Thai, Denny's, pancakes, scheduling concerts. I love you.

And That Should Be Enough... But I'm stuck in this Fucking Rut.

You would be right on the equator thousands of miles off the coast of Africa.
Hahaha, I'd kill you if you broke my vocal mic. Good thing I don't have one. Actaully I'd be rather ecstatic about it, for that would mean I got to work on this album with you.
Daily ego check: someone pointing and saying "hey! It's Mark Harpis!". Also a dj asking "any truth to the rumors of a blink-182 reunion?"
I'm so excited for these boys. They kill it. The show they put on. Oh god. How much fun they are is ridiculous! "Ass, don't spray me with your water gun!" Angela you called Alex an ass. It didn't seem like such a bad idea at the time... Angela I love you.
They're at Green Day. So fucking jealous. I need to move.
Why did my internet just die... Fuck... Hold on a sec...
OMG Adam's boyfriend is such a cutie. I love gay guys. Jessica shut up, their about to kiss. I've never seen two boys kiss before! OH MY GOD THAT WAS AMAZING! Shut up, he's getting on the bus!
Glambert for the win. He kills it. Every single fucking time.
Cameron, I'm a commy homo loving freak so what do you think about this quote? Well Jessica I'm an anarchist. Well that's clearly why we get along so well...

explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
yay
you get to hang out in the ghetto
It's About The Music says:
SWEET!
explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
it's basically awesome

explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
ROFL LET'S WATCH MY BROADWAY COPY OF RENT
AND CRY
AND EVERYONE ELSE WILL BE LIKE WTF
or we could watch hairspray and cry
because we don't get to do it next year
HAHA
It's About The Music says:
HAHAHHAHAHAHA
and then we'll be like fuck this
this is what a real musical looks like
explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
and eat lots of chips
It's About The Music says:
and we'll perform an improve version of Teen Angst the Musical

It's About The Music says:
hahhaha
we're like the shunned stockers
explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
danika was super friendly though
yar
It's About The Music says:
for we are artistically talents
explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
exactly
they can't handle our shit

explicitly_pink@hotmail.com says:
want to hear something awesome?
so I told my dad tonight that I'm failing 3/5 classes I'm taking this semester
and I haven't gotten permission from my parents yet to have my birthday party
HAHAH

Ugh I want to go to New York with her sooo bad. We could live in that AMAZING flat together. And stalk gay kids while being talents.

It's going to be my year. I'm not going to waste another minute here.

Mikey got a job at parking too! Stellar!
Looking at my calendar makes me want to cry.
My skin feels clean.
Only him and I can talk about his cats? OK! FUCK!
Want these potatoes, their Josh's. Why do you have them? cause I'm hungry. Fair enough.
Jessica come with me, you're kind of talented.
I just pulled that out my ass. Fake it till you make it!
I love when we get to sing. Sorry if I show off. Fuck you.
I love reading your stuff and unlike others, being so impressed, realize their other musicians song lyrics. Smooth moves bud. Dancing around in the bathroom much? Collision is such an ugly sound.
Fuck I gained two pounds. That's disgusting.
I'm is worried about you. Moving in with him. after he kissed you. Are you on crack? Your not eating again. Ugh... You make me sooo mad.
I always wanted to be poetic. Look how far that got us.
Also Raine Maida have my babies. No man will ever compare to you.
I can't come, I'll be Joe's pants then. Oh ok...
I'm stuck in this fucking rut.
Yeah right. No thanks.
I'm sleepy.
So glad I don't have to go early like the choir. gag.
I wanted to say something important here. But we see how well that's been going.
Oh still not surprised. Slash impressed.
It took a lot today. I need to out stand that. I can do this.

Manage me I'm a mess
Turn a page, I'm a book
Half unread

I wanna be laughed at
Laughed with, just because

I wanna feel weightless
And that should be enough

Well I'm stuck in this fucking rut
Waiting on a second hand pick me up
And I'm over, getting older

If I could just find the time
Then I would never let another day go by
I'm over, getting old

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

Make believe that I impress
That every word
By design
Turns a head

I wanna feel reckless
I wanna live it up, just because

I wanna feel weightless
Cause that would be enough

If I could just find the time
Then I would never let another day go by
I'm over, getting old

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

This could be all that I've waited for
(Waited, I've waited for)
And this could be everything
I don't wanna dream anymore

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonnna be my year
And I've been going crazy
I'm stuck in here

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year(it's gonna be my year)
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere(go nowhere)
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear(everything I fear)
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

There's no word unimportant.

Angela, what Would I do Without You?

When the new TBS album comes out I'm going to pee my pants again.
I'll buy you depends.
You'll buy me...
JESSICA DAMNIT! I WAS BEING SO GOOD TODAY!
HAHAHAHAHHA!

I love you Angela.

Rather Disgusted

Did I tell you about my photoshoot for the cover? No. I think I did.
Anywho i found the photographer.
He was on the Bachelorette tonight.
Kyle is going to design the album art. He was on that show too.
I love kids.
That's how I refer to the people I love to hang out with.

On another note.
Angela I love you.

I think I just killed Angela.
I hope this stays quiet.
I can't imagine life once the world finds out.
Fuck.

This Is The 2nd Time I Had a Heartattack This Week

OMG! OMG! OMG! I get to see the boys again. Carrying around thier Smirnoff. HAHAHAHA! OMG I HAVE TO GO TEXT PEOPLE! OMG! OMFG!

I'm Going Through This Phase

It's quite an amazing phase. It's an OLP phase.
Why did I add her as a friend? Fuck I'm stupid.

"Are You Sad?"

Your life has been so hard
It's dried up angels that can't keep guard
I'm trying to reach your hand
But I'm on fire
I never planned to fade... away
Stay with me
Stop pretending when they say that you're nothing

Are you sad?
Are you holding yourself?
Are you locked in your room?
You shouldn't be..

I'm drowning inside your head
Help me to answer
Help understand
Why it's been so long since we talked like friends
Please, forgive me,
I'm just a man
Whose made mistakes

Stop pretending when they say you're nothing

Are you sad?
Are you holding yourself?
Are you locked in your room?
You shouldn't be..

All Canadian Bands Truely Wish To Be As Successful

Our Lady Peace is the shit. If you don't know what I'm talking about I officially disown you.
I am not interpreting anything anymore. It's not worth it.
Chill day. It was appreciated. Food. Video games. Chilling.
I'm almost kind of tired.
Mouth in less pain but still let there be pain!
It's like when two friends date. They still must see each other eventually. So don't be a dick about it.
Didn't hear from you today. That's strange. I dislike that.
Was reading all the little speeches on PS the other day and one said always to forgive for life is to short to live it angry. But what if one is over the anger. What if one is just living? What if the worlds don't seem to coincide anymore? I thought a lot about that in the shower today. Like I said best time for thinking.
I wonder if he ever looks back. And if he does, does he realize what it really was that he was talking about? He floats through my thoughts a lot as we saw with the last post.
I wish more of life had documentation. How amazing memories can be.
Doesn't it seem like yesterday we were sitting in the Metro Grill eating four different types of hummus, crab cakes and ahi? It feels that way to me. Walking back across the street, getting cheesecake going back to the hotel and just chilling. Seeing all the stuff we bought. That was a great weekend. I'd kill to live that weekend over and over again. Waking up late, doing each others hair, going shopping. Thank you for choosing to stay at our hotel please enjoy this complimentary snack. OMG COOKIES! THEY GAVE US FREE COOKIES! HOLY SHIT! I hope we get to go somewhere again.
So you fucked this up again? It's time for you to leave. You never had any friends and you thought this was alright?
Oh Raine...
Dolmades are yucky. Blag...
I wish I could write these thoughts somewhere without judgment. Without having to mask them like he did. Or wait, did he not? What's it like having everyone know everything about you...
Maybe I'm afraid to say anything for it will be like a surrender. But at the same time as happy as I was, was it worth the other thoughts? Who let you in? I don't know what I'm doing anymore. One more year and I can figure out how the fuck to use a sound board.
Like I said shower thinking is bad.
Love,
Throw away the radio
Suitcase...Keeps you awake
Hide the telephone, the telephone
Telephone in case...You realize that
Sometimes your just not OK
You level out, level out, level out
It's not alright now...You need to understand
There's nothing strange about this
You need to know your friends...You need to know that

I'll be waving my hand
Watching you drown, watching you scream, quiet or loud
And maybe you should sleep
And maybe you just need...A friend
As clumsy as you've been there's no one laughing
You will be safe in here, you will be safe in here

Throw away this very old...shoe lace
Tripped you again
Try to shrug it off, shrug it off, shrug it off
Sow the skin now
You need to understand...there's nothing fake about this
You need to let me in...watching you and

I'll be waving my hand
Watching you drown, watching you scream, no one's around
And maybe you should sleep
And maybe you just need...A friend
As clumsy has you've been, there's no one laughing
You will be safe in here, you will be safe in...

I'll be wavin my hand...Watching you drown...
Watching you scream...Quiet or loud...
And maybe you should sleep
And maybe you just need...A friend
As clumsy as you've been, there's no one laughing
You will be safe in here, you will be safe in here...Yeah
You will be safe in here...in here...Yeah
in here...Yeah...in here...Yeah...in here...Yeah
in here...Yeah....in here...Yeah

(I wanted to pick a single line, but just couldn't.)

No Words

Oh sweetheart put the bottle down. You got too much talent. I see you through those blood shot eyes. There's a cure you've found it.

Also I figured it out. Listen to the Weakerthans and you might to.

Love,
St. Boniface

I've come to realize. A lot. In the most recent few months. I knew it all before. But it seemed I got sidetracked. We all need our space. There was/is a lot of deep stuff up there. I can read simple lines and start bawling my eyes out. I believe much like many others. That that may be the last. It seems to be a good place to end it on. Maybe that's what it all meant? I don't know. People need privacy. That privacy needs to be respected. We're all just human in the end. Doesn't mean I won't continue worrying about you. You've come so far. It's amazing. I'm proud of all the work you've done and have yet to do. You're an inspiration. Maybe I love you. Just when you think you got it. You realize you don't. Don't let anyone and their shit bring you down. It's not worth it. Why? Because you're worth so much more than that. We're worth so much more than that.
Love,
I lost somewhere along the line.

All this time I thought something went wrong. When really it all went forward. It all went ahead. You reached that before me. You're my hope. A month ago I was singing a song. But songs change. Don't they? We both know that. Where would I be if I hadn't found you? Afraid and confused and alone in my room. When you're sincere like that. All those things you helped me through. You'll never know. I would just love to. I don't know. You'll eventually realize we're already in the real world. That's me. I wish these words could be as beautiful as yours. But nothing could make them so. I've come to realize the conclusion. It's all good. We will continue strong. The cross will keep glowing. The love that is yours that I've always felt will be like the smoke always blowing. Maybe the world will come to accept I'm so much different than that. That I am not the norm. Nor will I ever sink to it. I will have my opinions and they will be mine. We will always be growing.
See Me Fly

So You Wanna Know?

What it's like to be ahead of the rest of the world?
Well you'll never know.
One more thing, potentially, to cross off my bucket list.

What Do You Do On Friday Nights?

Well I talk to Richie. Guitar Guitar.

That Post I was Promising

*groan* Why didn't I buy that herbal tea? My mouth is in so much pain. And I'm trying to stay away from things like Tylenol. Plus pain builds character. Note to self: if you want to lose weight merely get extremely painful braces. It's working well for me right now... I wish there were mashed potatoes around here somewhere...
Was listening to Sober today. And totally saw a new outlook on it. after being away, how can I feel this good sober? It's astounding. The revelations I have come to.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89V7hvEmSD8
This to.

Ugh then he filed between my teeth. Oh the blood.
I wish I could sing like Kelly. Makes me mad.
Garner, TW and kids coming over tomorrow. Should be stellar times. I've yet to abuse that, unless you count the 200 cds he gave me. He should give me a job. I could work for a radio station. One things for sure I wouldn't complain to Jacob Hoggard why Jacob Hoggard hadn't shown up yet.
Aww do your friends not like you anymore? Saw you in your lumberjack shirt today. I thought you would have been going camping to?
Legally Blonde kills souls.
I'm a unicorn. Take that bitches.
NPH can ride me! HAHAHAHA! JK! Watch Harold and Kumar and you'll understand so much more of life.
Take your sweater off. You just went from a 6 to a 7. Put on my jacket. You just solidified your 7. No not yet. Take off the glasses. OMG 7.56!!!!!
So watching Cupid today. Good show. Check it out. anywho... So the guy on it was a radio VJ in New York who was all about the indie punk scene. and he met this girl who had kids. And he gave up coffee and flannel shirts for a family. You see I see life so much differently then the rest of people. If someone granted my dreams I wouldn't have said no so easily. It made me realize I could totally go to Seattle though. Places of interest: Toronto, Seattle, California, New York and Vancouver. *insert useful education system conversation Cameron and Jessica style*
Taking Back Sunday = impressive
You see right there! Wait! Right there you just utilized your opportunities! HAHAHAHAHA! What are you two discussing? Uhm how to utilize our opportunities...
I know this. I feel it in my thoughts. In my blood. In every part of me. In what I wear. In what I hear. In who I hang out with. In everything I do. The way I do anything is the way I do everything.
Vampire Weekend. Coheed.
I need to do the music. It's what I have. It's everything.
Saw the perfect band photo today.
Picure this. 4 guys standing on a corner. You can see the do not walk sign to the far left. They're all standing there looking forward, looking chill. Three of the guys look normal. The kid second from the post has shaggy hair and AA hoodie. BOOM! There it is. 3 band members. Emo lead singer. All there. Myspace photo. Photo for signing.
Greaser= flannel shirt, greasy hair, tight jeans
Talented kid= jeans, hoodie, leather jacket
How true this actually is...

Just As It Loses It's Magic

Was going to write that thing. Probably not until early tomorrow morning. Which is on it's way.
So Paris...
So with holding so much information.
Why isn't she calling me back? I is more important than Charlotte. Also Colin should tell me what that is, so that I can go buy tickets in confidence!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPakCNTGudE
Thats fucking ridiculous. David asks me. We're being chill today you and me. Patrick randomly rapes my leg. Since we're all tight now. That Scott and I restyled Cam. He became a 7. That's all I'm saying. I can't go because girlfriend hates me. Trust me it didn't need to be said. Whatever. Just don't marry her like the last one.

I think I just had a heart attack. I am saying nothing. Nothing at all.

The bands I need to Know Inside out For July

The Acorn

(ON) - Intricate arrangements and euphoric melodies paint an electro-acoustic post card for lost souls.

Justin Adams and Juldeh Camara

(UK/Gambia) - Guitarist/producer Adams and griot master Camara create a rousing African-rock fusion with echoes of ancient blues.

Akron/Family

(USA) - These improvisational alt-folkers orchestrate epic, vintage otherworldly hymns around three-part harmonies.

Darol Anger, Mike Marshall & Väsen

(USA/Sweden) - Two virtuosos of American new music meet Sweden’s influential instrumental trio to push acoustic music boundaries.

Apostle of Hustle

(ON) - Broken Social Scene’s Andrew Whiteman builds polyrhythmic collages from re-imagined Cuban music, mambo, Americana and pop.

Arrested Development

(USA) - For 15 years, these pioneers of conscious rap and hip-hop have shaken the booties, hearts and minds of listeners across the globe.

Danny Barnes Acoustic Band

(USA) - An imaginative banjo player and his hot trio create unplugged bluegrass alchemy with a deep respect for traditions.

Bell Orchestre

(ON) - A textured chamber-pop orchestral group that shares members with Arcade Fire and the Luyas and borrows freely from post-rock, jazz and classical music.

Bellowhead

(UK) - This rousing, sharp-suited folk big band recounts colourful historical tales in a glorious multi-instrumental genre-blending mash-up.

Mark Berube and the Patriotic Few

(BC) - Beautifully-rendered stories, soaring harmonies, surprising twists in pace and style, and pure musicianship.

Glen Campbell

(USA) - This living legend is loved for his countrypolitan crooning, virtuosic guitar playing, witty banter and recordings that stand the test of time.

Hayes Carll

(USA) - Caustic and charming, irreverent and observant, this is Texas folk that will melt the hardest heart and heat up a roadhouse.

Jay Crocker

(AB) - A deftly woven, experimental pop/jazz trip with strong melodies, surreal lyrics and inspired instrumentation.

Amelia Curran

(NFLD) - Unpretentious, crisp and melodic songs that echo in your head as the lyrics resonate in your conscience.

Kat Danser

(AB) - Throwing down laidback rhythms and thought-provoking lyrics, this is music steeped in early blues traditions, backed by soulful lap slide guitar picking.

Steve Dawson

(BC) - Multi-instrumentalist, producer and musical chameleon brings his big ears, musical imagination and endless classy licks.

Decemberists

(USA) - Creative independent pop music that often utilizes elaborate song forms rooted in ancient languages, myths and imagery.

Deep Dark Woods

(SK) - Their timeless sound is built around raw emotion, beautiful vocals, strong harmonies and well thought out arrangements.

Dragon Fli Empire

(AB) - Classic, unadulterated down-to-earth hip hop with insightful and comedic lyrics.

Dry Branch Fire Squad

(USA) - For over 25 years, they’ve crafted ruggedly soulful bluegrass, fired up with biting satire and wry political commentary.

The Ebony Hillbillies

(USA) - Touted as "the last black string band in America” their 19th century string dance band sound is built on fiddles, banjo and washboard.

Alejandro Escovedo

(USA) - Original, gutsy and moving roots music from an artist whose musical incarnations range from punk rock to string quintets.

Esthero

(ON) - Her sound and captivating voice have been the thread that weaves jazz, funk and soul into an effortless ethereal melting pot since she emerged in the late ‘90s.

Ferron

(BC) - For 30 years, this acclaimed singer/songwriter has moved audiences with her commanding alto voice and mesmerizing, experiential lyrics.

Michael Bernard Fitzgerald

(AB) - An old soul who pens refreshing soul-infused pop songs.

Michael Franti and Spearhead

(USA) - His latest CD All Rebel Rockers further imbues Franti’s fiery protest music with seductive elements of dub and hook-infused soul.

Dick Gaughan

(UK) - This raconteur takes no prisoners with his vast repertoire, powerful voice and rapid-fire guitar-playing.

Gomez

(UK) - Mercury Prize winners create rootsy, quirky independent pop music that often incorporates psychedelic sounds, experimentation and loops.

Good Lovelies

(ON) - Armed with an arsenal of instruments and a repertoire of sassy, fun and sophisticated songs that borrow from by-gone eras.

Sarah Harmer

(ON) - Engaging, ageless urban folk and newgrass from an artist also known for her strong environmental convictions.

Jolie Holland

(USA) - Haunting, timeless simplicity from a writer with a singular vision who has been dubbed the ‘queen of indie teardrop ballads.’

Ray Wylie Hubbard

(USA) - This legendary Texas troubadour writes like he has the devil at his tail, the Good Lord in his heart, a saddlebag of poetry and a pistol in his boot.

Iron and Wine

(USA) - Sam Beam’s deeply affecting, lyrically-evocative songs range from quiet and haunting to driven and hook-laden.

Kid Koala

(QC) - He deftly weaves hip-hop beats, silent movie soundtracks, spoken word and scratch-created melodies into magical multi-track stories.

Labess

(QC) - Intriguing, festive songs that celebrate tolerance and freedom, drawing from flamenco, Cuban and North African music.

LeE HARVeY OsMOND

(ON) - Swampy, hypnotic ‘acid folk’ from Junkhouse’s Tom Wilson, plus co-conspirators from the Cowboy Junkies, the Skydiggers, and long-time folkie Brent Titcomb.

Luluc

(Australia) - The spare, austere beauty of this duo’s haunting, reflective music is based around un-amplified instruments and close harmonies.

Carolyn Mark

(BC) - You'll laugh. You'll cry. And laugh some more, at the lovely and talented country songstress’s bang-on ditties about humanity.

Loreena McKennitt

(ON) - Singer/composer, harpist and pianist whose soothing songs are grounded in Celtic and Middle Eastern music and influenced by literature.

Mekons

(UK/USA) - A 30-year tour de force with art school roots and multi-pronged connections to other bands; their sound blends a punk ethos with left wing politics, folk and minimalist country.

Mirah

(USA) - The oh-so-charming Yom Tov Zeitlyn’s candid musings are enveloped in sparse, organic music with an edge, punctuated by horns and strings.

Los Misioneros del Norte

(Mexico) - Contemporary accordion-centred Norteño dance music, influenced by syncopated Caribbean cumbias and salsa.

Mutabaruka

(Jamaica) - Heavy, deep words and beats from a world-renowned revolutionary dub and reggae poet.

Myrol

(AB) - Spine-tingling harmonies and down-home lyrics from this live-wire female roots/ country duo.

Pacifika

(BC) - Take a Peruvian-born singer steeped in flamenco and electronica, add a new wave and classically-influenced guitarist, mix in one dubwise bassist and voila! You have new groove-based global pop.

Steven Page

(ON) - Infamous Barenaked Ladies co-founder, guitarist and lead singer is loved for his dynamic performances, powerful tenor, quick wit and arsenal of clever songs.

PAPAGROOVE

(BC) - This 13-piece collective blasts out horn-based funk, R&B and Afrobeat, for a full-on dance party with a solid political message.

The Persuasions

(USA) - Five kids who sang in basements and street corners in the ‘60s are now the kings of a capella, infusing standards and covers with their harmonious soul, gospel and Motown sound in concert halls world-wide.

Ramblin' Ambassadors

(AB) - Surf, rockabilly and instrumental garage music with a twist: expect the occasional trumpet, sleigh bell percussion and loopy keyboard.

Justin Rutledge

(ON) - His haunting, literate stories are snapshots of ordinary people’s lives, delivered in a tearstained voice, with the subtle backing of his crack band.

The Sojourners

(BC) - Spine-tingling, multi-textured vocals from a trio who capture the spirit of soulful “old school” 1930s and ‘40s gospel recordings.

Mavis Staples

(USA) - For over fifty years, Mavis Staples has been an international treasure, working her vocal magic on the highways and byways of gospel, folk and soul music.

Tarhana

(Nederlands/Turkey) - The sounds of ancient cultures come to life: Sufi grooves, Gypsy melodies and North African rhythms.

The Tom Fun Orchestra

(NS) - Cape Breton’s idiosyncratic eight-piece ensemble creates frantic cross-genre barnburners featuring feverish horns and violins.

Umalali

(Central America) - An entrancing journey into the heart and soul of the Garifuna people, built around powerful female vocals, pounding rhythms and an African/Caribbean music meld.

Chad Van Gaalen

(AB) - A visual artist and musician, he creates beautiful melodies with intellectually playful arrangements.

Vishten

(PEI) - Embark on a centuries-long voyage with traditional music, fiery fiddling, step dancing and sweet vocals.

Emily Wells

(USA) - Her songs combine electronics, orchestral strings, jazz structures, pop sensibilities and vibrato-laden vocals into one eclectic package.

Nancy White

(ON) - Take a carnival ride through life’s little perversities with this topical, cheeky folk/cabaret singer, theatre writer and performer.

Phil Wiggins & Corey Harris

(USA) - Deep-rooted 21st century country blues with renowned harmonica wizard Wiggins and adventurous, eclectic guitarist Harris.

Jason Wilson

(ON) - Vintage and visionary jazz-infused reggae from a refreshingly inventive band whose lyrical tales are meditations on the human condition.

The Woodchoppers Association with Jah Youssouf

(ON/Mali) - The electrifying kora of Youssouf collides with the trance-inducing grooves of Canada’s premier improviser’s orchestra.

Yeah no biggie. What do I need to know? Their sounds. Sounds like. Discography. When they're playing. Like I said no big.
Another post about music to come later.
Weakerthans are kiling me right now.

I just Remember Brent

That kids sweet.
Also... Since I'm being nice this week aparrently.. What the fuck is up with that anywho?
http://www.myspace.com/noeljohnsonmusic
Apparently Layne's coming but he never invited me... That hurt my feeling.
I could go watch Lost already but Mom and Ty are doing homework. So I shall wait.
Adam Lambert anyone?

Sweatheart Put The Bottle Down

I want Kelly Clarkson hair. 'nuff said.
see me fly. Like gangsta's. Because I'm gangsta. and that's how I would pose as the symbol for my record label. And i would sign gangstas cause I'm a gangsta.
James stop staring. Go smoke weed somewhere else.
Passivity passive the passives.
Steal Kill and Destroy
Check 'em out! Faith based man. But check it out. Substance abuse is not it. It's never it.

When I See Adam Lambert

My clothes magically disappear!
SHOT GUN!
YOU CAN"T SHOTGUN ADAM!
YES I CAN!
This is what it would look like...
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I love Gr. 10 buddies.
I hated this morning. Was just in a gross mood. I hate my morning classes.
Get to theater after buying me and Colin some icecream because we deserve it. Just hope it stays. So then I'm just chilling with Josh. Then I talk to Cam. Cam and I go to Petro. Scott and David meet us with the car at Petro. David's car is sooo small, I had to crouch so my head wouldn't hit the ceiling/roof. Shannon almost hit us! SHANNON YOU BITCH! HAHAHAHAHAA! Ran into Justin. Justin and I go scope out hotties in the caf.
Oh forgot! Cam introduced me to this dude from our school in a band and I'm supposed to go listen to his band online... Anywho... Ok so me and Justin be checking out the cuties. Then Zoe happens along and we continue dicussing pretty-ness. Then we discuss how no one can be a ten. Geordie walks by... Just kidding. There are tens! HAHAHAHA! YES! I love you ZOE!
Edmonds went out. So Mr. P chilled in the green room so we all went to the caf to scope out hotties. Dur. There were minimal people, Myles walked past once. But lets face it... So we discussed him. Then we discussed ADAM LAMBERT! AND THEN I TAKE ALL MY CLOTHES OFF AS I JUMP! IT"S LIKE A MAGIC TRICK! SHOT GUN! SYDNEY!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA! We run back to the theater as teachers are beginning to watch us. WE dance about Legally Blonde. Jessie let us all go early so I got on the early bus.
Man was she pissed. She gonna kill you...
Grilled cheese. YARM!.....
http://www.myspace.com/achangeofpace
I'm dancing. Amazing. Thanks for adding me dudes. Otherwise I never would have heard you. and you kill!
Also.
Hi I'm ted, your cute. Let's be friends.
Oh Ted you and the ladies.
David I'm not wearing the right pants to climb in the back of your car. This is so unclassy. You don't have your? FUCK! HAHAHAHAHA! Jessica thought she was going to die. Oh David how I lie. I know you. Inside out. There's a reason you act the way you do. 10. 'nuff said.
OMG TED"S A MYSPACE MANWHORE! THIS IS GREAT!
Why must life be amazing...
Tomorrow morning is going to bring me down... Oh well going out with the Mommy afterwards to see Dr. Ken. WOOT!
Also did I tell you about that blog I read about Emo boys? Anywho I found it late one early morning. Pissed myself laughing.
OMG I LOOK LIKE LIGHTS! No you're a ho, stop hitting on your friends boyfriend.
I'm going to tell him he has a stalker. Do it. Yeah don't tell. Oh I know. It's weird.
Caleb was being fishy today. He was being quiet and unsmiley... Not coo...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q62pOio7PaY
I don't know about you Kelly. But I like his friend in the red jacket better.
Jessica put your boobs away! WHAT!? I don't want you getting pregnant! Oh that's not a problem, haven't you noticed I attract gays? How come you can but I can't! FUCK THIS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Story of life.
What was that bands name! FRIG! Gotta go get phone, text Justin.
Waiting on response...
Chillling to A Change of Pace.
Ok well I'll be back when I figure this out...
Ok I found them. Listening...
Cameron was impressed I listen to offspring...
http://www.myspace.com/shatterthesilencenow
Uhm not sure what to say... I'm thinking. Maybe you guys can help me out with this. Cam said they're actually pretty good and at their Den gig some record guys are coming. I think they'd be better live. No lie. I can tell that. david would be impressed. He tried to fight about music with me the other day. I told him. That's all I'm saying.
Also I'm not juggling my boys. They're just more chill to hang with. Plus they drive. That's all I'm saying.
Dude where was I the other day where someone actually said Rock out with your cock out. Oh! I was at KOS! HAHAHAhA!
Killed back today during Legally blonde. Created a smell-a-thon of Dom. I claimed that something smelt like man. and Jordan was like its Dom. So there were like five of us smelling him. He was like yeah that's me, I smell good. Then everyone kept asking me to smell them.
Ok these guys are dece.
I'm going to stop talking now... And go stalk people on the net. Why do I keep seeing your posts like 10 minutes afterwards. I need to sleep.
WOAH! That's what I was going to say! Ok ever do stuff in your sleep and you forget. Well apparently I got hot last night and decided to take my sweater off, noticed that when I woke up in my bra. Lol. I also noticed my water was all gone. Made me sad...
Anywho after I just told the whole wide world I woke up in my bra it's time to go. Going to listen to tunes and stalk Ted. My new internet friend. Wonder what Navid's been up to...
Love,
The Internet in a Black Bra.